The Love Stage You And Your Partner Are Facing
Medically Reviewed By Karen Devlin, LPCLove is a wonderful thing, and you and your partner want to experience it in the best way possible, but that requires you to understand each other and express the love you feel for each other. Another important thing to understand about your relationship is the love stage that you are in. Is your relationship just getting started, or have you been together for a long time? Maybe you're somewhere in the middle. No matter where you are, it's going to affect the way you express your love for your partner.
The sooner you realize that there are different stages of love, the better it will be for your relationship. Many relationships end because people think that they must not love each other anymore when, in reality, it's just that their stage is changing. You should love your partner despite this. If you're willing to stick with it and work through it, you'll experience a love that is far better than anything you could have imagined.
Your Love Stage
There are five different stages of love that you'll want to take a look at to understand where you and your partner currently are. We'll look at each of the phases and how each of them will improve your love for each other. By looking at each of the stages of love, you'll be able to help each other express what you feel and slowly begin to grow even stronger as a couple. This is the foundation for developing unconditional love. All you need to do is put a little effort into it, and you can make a difference.
Before we get into the details, the five stages are:
- Falling in love
- Becoming a couple
- The end?
- Making it last
- Changing the World
Falling In Love
The first stage is when you and your partner start to fall in love with each other. You love your partner regardless of what else may be going on in your life. You can’t help it! It's the process of actually falling in love where you feel all the wonderful and happy emotions that come along with finding that special someone. You feel elated, and you imagine all of the happy and positive things that you've wanted for yourself and your partner. You can't imagine anything even better than this and can't imagine ever fighting or having anything less than perfect with your partner.
This is one of the stages of a relationship often referred to as "young love" or "puppy love." You think about the person all the time. They are the first thing you think of in the morning and the last thing you think of at night. When you are in this place, you overlook the imperfections of your partner and the tendencies they have that would normally drive you crazy. All is right with the world when you are in this stage.
It's an idealistic stage, and it doesn't last long.
Becoming A Couple
You start to become a couple in the next stage, and this is where you're going to start experiencing changes in the relationship that the two of you have. This can be one of the more confusing relationship stages. There are two ways that relationships go from here. Some relationships end because as the endorphins die down and you start to pick up on the imperfections, you may realize that the person isn't the one you want to be with. But, some relationships can easily settle into a more comfortable form of love.
When that happens, you're going to start recognizing that your relationship is different, and you become stronger for it. You start to feel happy with your partner but maybe not so wild and crazy about it. You start to feel comfortable, and you're more than happy to think that this is the way that your relationship is going to continue for the rest of your lives.
The End?
Stage 3 is where you might think your relationship is ending, but it's just another beginning if you are willing to stick with it. You and your partner may experience more problems somewhere in this stage. Still, you can definitely work through this and create a healthy and happy relationship again that’s filled with even more unconditional love.
You may find that you are starting to argue more. If you lack good communication within your relationship, it can be setting you up for failure. Or, if you don't believe that couples with happy relationships argue, then you are probably willing to throw in the towel and look for a relationship that will be "easier." In reality, this is just one of the stages of love that every relationship moves through.
The key to getting through this stage is making sure that you keep working at it. This is where things get difficult, but it's most definitely not the end because, at the end of this stage, you're going to be better and stronger than ever.
Making It Last
Next up in the stages of a relationship is one that leads to your future. This is where you and your partner start to understand what caused the problems in stage 3, and you start to improve your relationship after. You have to put in more effort here, but you'll be starting to see some of the improvements and the benefits of all that work by now. You're starting to get into the home stretch when it comes to making a loving and lasting relationship that will continue for the rest of your lives. You're also near the final step.
A few things to keep in mind as you work through this stage is that you may feel a little disappointed that the first stage of love when you feel all those wonderful feelings are gone. It can be tough to swallow, but it's important to acknowledge that even though you don't get those butterflies in your stomach at the mention of your partner's name, it doesn't mean it's a bad thing. It's a good thing because your relationships are progressing, and your love is deepening.
Now that you have a history with each other and have made it through some challenges as a couple through the stages of love, you are ready to move on. Some couples hang out in this stage for a couple of years before moving on.
Changing The World
The final stage of a relationship is when you recognize that you are meant to be and that you're going to last. This is also where you start to recognize what you can do for the rest of the world. You can continue to improve your life, and you can continue to reach out to others to help them do the same. With so much love and beauty in your relationship, it's a time when you can most definitely help other people see how they are doing on their path and understand how to get just where you are.
There are not many couples that make it to this stage, missing out on experiencing unconditional love. Even many married couples fail to reach this point. When you do get here, you realize that you don't miss stage 1 anymore because you have something so much better. To have those puppy love feelings would mean starting over, and you are plenty happy with where you are. You know the faults and imperfections of your partner, and you can accept them. Those little things that used to annoy you so much are just things that you accept as part of who your partner is.
This stage isn't reached easily or quickly. It takes time and overcoming challenges together to reach this deepest stage of love.
Your Relationship Needs
Where is your relationship on the path that we've just talked about? Are you still in stage 1 and thinking about puppy love and all your hopes and dreams? Are you stuck in stage 3 trying to figure out what's happening and just when you ended up so bitter? You will need to work your way through each stage to get to the best part of your relationship together. Even though it's going to take some hard work and some effort, your relationship is worth it. Putting up with some of the negatives is going to help you make your way.
You can't rush through the stages. It's nice to think that you could hurry along to reach that deep stage of love, but it doesn't work that way. You will naturally move through each stage, and while there are some similarities as to when this happens, it isn't the same for everyone.
Getting Help
If you and your partner seem to be struggling in your relationship, then it's time to reach out for some help. There are plenty of professionals out there who can help you move along the path and through each of the different stages, but you may not know about some of the best options. That's because the best options are the ones that aren't in your physical proximity at all. These are the ones that you can contact directly through the Internet and stay in touch with through your online service. The key is making sure that you find the right person.
ReGain is the best place for you to look online for a psychiatrist. It's a fully online system that connects you with professionals all over the country, and all you need to do is find one that you're comfortable with. From there, you'll be able to reach out to them whenever you need them without ever having to leave the comfort of your own home. Of course, since everything takes place online, you can still connect by getting online from anywhere with a connection if you do leave your home. Before you know it, you and your partner could be on a path to an even better relationship.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
What is the last stage of love?: The final stage of love is where you start to make a difference together. This is the opposite of the honeymoon stage, where you’re so swept up in your emotions for each other. The love with your partner will change over time, and it’s those partners who discover this change and embrace it who will last the longest. This stage of love is about working together to achieve a unified goal. This is what strengthens the bond between a couple.
How long do feelings of love last?: The answer to this question really depends on the kind of love you’re talking about, as there are different stages of love. Couples who have fallen in love believe that they’re going to feel this way forever, but that sensation actually goes away after two or three years. Many people mistake this because there is no longer love in their relationship; however, it’s this stage of love where most couples break up. On the other hand, unconditional love is much deeper, as you and your partner both learn to evolve and grow to a new stage of love where more difficult decisions have to be made.
Does the in-love feeling fade?: At the very beginning, couples at this stage are overcome with euphoria and excitement for being with someone. This is because of the dopamine that is coursing through them. However, the brain cannot sustain this kind of release for extended periods of time, causing the “dopamine buzz” to fade over time. This is natural for all relationship stages, but many people mistake the lack of “buzz,” meaning that they no longer share the love with their partner.
This can lead to them breaking up before they get to the next stage of love, where the brain is releasing an entirely new set of hormones. These are oxytocin and vasopressin. These chemicals are responsible for attachment in humans, which are also found in other animals that mate for life. Even when the initial romance is gone, people can still share the love; it’s just in a new form.
How do I know I’m in love?: One sign that you’ve fallen in love is that you focus on the other person’s positive qualities and ignore or overlook their negative qualities. This is normal for couples at this stage since they’re just starting to learn things about the other person and don’t want to be jaded by any negative aspects. Eventually, you will learn to love your partner as they are, positive and negative qualities together.
Another sign for people who love each other in the beginning is that they experience positive intrusive thinking. It can seem like obsessive behavior, thinking about that one person all the time, but it will diminish over time.
At the early stages of a relationship, couples will display emotional dependency on the other person, including possessiveness, fear of rejection, and separation anxiety. This is seemingly natural for the honeymoon stage of the relationship, but it can be detrimental to the relationship itself if this kind of behavior continues.
Do intense relationships last?: A couple that lasts forever naturally experiences the different stages of love, but that doesn’t mean the feeling of being madly in love has to go away. People who love each other can still experience intense passion. It just requires both partners to put in the work.
Sexual frequency did play a part in long-term relationships that expressed still have romantic love. Inclusion and proximity also played a part in maintaining that sensation of being madly in love.
What’s surprising is that in comparing long-term romantic love with the love experienced in the early stages of a relationship, the former actually activates more brain areas, such as the areas responsible for serotonin release.
