Can Young Love Last?
Some people may talk about young love as a beautiful thing, but many consider it something that will never last. We might think of it as cute or fun, but we might also assume it’s something people eventually outgrow. You might find yourself wondering if this type of love ever lasts, particularly if you’re in the midst of young love yourself. Is it possible for someone who experiences young love to make things work with their partner? The answer may be: It depends.
The truth behind young love
Love may be different for everyone who experiences it. You likely dated more than one person in your life before you ended up with the partner you have now. And the length of time it took to find that person may have been shorter or longer than the person next to you. Maybe you found your special someone at 20, and your best friend didn't find the right person until they were 40. It may vary from person to person.
But that doesn’t mean that young love can't last. Who is to say that the relationship you started when you were 20 or even 18 or younger isn't the relationship you're meant to be in for the rest of your life? The prognosis for the relationship may have less to do with the age you are when you enter it and more to do with the person you and your partner are. Two 16-year-olds might end up with a better and longer-lasting relationship than two 40-year-olds, depending on the situation.
Making it last
Perhaps the key to making your relationship last, no matter your age, is to make sure that you and your partner are compatible with one another. You may want to ask yourself how well the two of you get along, for instance. Consider how you handle disagreements and arguments. Do you spend time together and talk to one another? These things may all play a part in whether you can make a relationship last, and they're things that you can learn, even if you're not so good at them right now.
Grow together
Many young couples may struggle because they are still learning who they are as individuals. They may be finding their place in the world and discovering who they want to be. When couples meet young, it may be reasonable to expect that there will be changes along the way. Ideally, these couples will focus on growing together and supporting each other.
If you’re experiencing young love and want to make it last, consider working on building a strong relationship and showing your partner how much you care about them. You may want to be open and honest with them about how you feel and what you want out of the relationship. Be accepting and loving when it comes to their hopes and dreams.
Keep things in common
Couples who make it for the long haul may enjoy spending time with each other. This might seem like an obvious statement, but it could be easier than you think to grow apart throughout a long-term relationship. When you start dating, it's normal to do things that you don't necessarily enjoy just so that you can spend time with that special person.
For example, a girl who hates football may find herself watching her boyfriend's favorite team. Or, a guy who despises the mall might find himself standing outside of the dressing room holding his girlfriend’s purse for an entire day while she tries on clothes. You may do this for each other because you value quality time together.
As the years go by, it can be easy to start spending less time together. There may be career ladders to climb, kids' activities to go to, and more. You might stay so busy doing things on your own that you could end up feeling like you're living with a stranger.
The key to overcoming this relationship challenge may be to search for things you enjoy doing together and then continue to make time for those activities. This also means that you can keep doing those things that you don't enjoy, just for the pleasure of spending time with your significant other. You can discover ways that the two of you can learn and grow together, creating a stronger and healthier relationship along the way.
This can be equally challenging when you're at an age when your friends are still single and encouraging you to go out with them. In this situation, you might want to make sure that you are making decisions that your significant other is comfortable with.
Still, young couples who learn to respect each other in their decision-making without becoming bitter or resentful can have fulfilling, long-lasting relationships. It may be helpful to remember that FOMO (fear of missing out) can be detrimental to your relationship. Instead of thinking about what you aren't doing that other people your age are doing, you might consider focusing on all the good things you are enjoying in your relationship.
Understand what true love is
You and your partner may both need to be committed to making the relationship work if you're hoping to make young love last. You'll both need to be willing to put in the effort and work hard, even when your friends may be busy with flings or short-term relationships that they know aren't going to last. It can be difficult to be the only one in a committed long-term relationship when people around you seem to be going out and having fun with no strings attached. But when you think about how much your partner means to you, it can get easier.
For young love to last, you may both need to understand what true love is. The puppy love stage may wear off, and the exciting feeling that you had at the beginning could change into something deeper. However, when you see your friends going through the beginning stages of meeting a new someone time and time again, you might wonder why your relationship doesn't feel how their relationship looks.
It could help to remember that real love can be more than those first flutters of excitement. Just because those feelings dissipate, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you aren't in love with that person anymore. It may just mean you have transitioned to a new love stage.
The long-term effects
Finding your ideal soulmate or your perfect match when you're young can have some advantages. For one thing, you may have someone special that you can count on and trust from an early age. That could make things easier and more pleasurable throughout your life. You may also get to be with your partner for a longer period of time compared to those couples who meet later in life.
Of course, some people may say you're missing out on some of the fun that goes along with being young. The flip side of this could be that you avoid a lot of the heartbreak that your friends may be suffering going from relationship to relationship. It may also mean that you don't ever have to feel alone. You might also save a lot of time and effort looking for that special someone since you’ve already found them.
Counseling for young love
Young love can sometimes be challenging. If your relationship is struggling or you’re unsure whether it was meant to be, help is available. An expert relationship counselor or other mental health professional can help you and your partner navigate the issues in your relationship.
It can be difficult to reach out for relationship help, though, especially in person. In that case, an online environment may be more suitable. Many couples report feeling more at ease talking about their problems with an online counselor.
Despite concerns over its legitimacy, online counseling has proven to be effective in treating a wide range of relationship issues and mental health challenges. One recent study found that counseling via videoconferencing resulted in positive outcomes for various populations, including individuals, couples, and families.
Takeaway
With counseling, you may be able to work on things and come to a better understanding of just where your relationship is going. Regain is one way you can work towards that level of improvement, no matter how new your relationship is. Because it's online, you don't have to worry about making it to the office or planning sessions around your work trips. Instead, you can attend online sessions from home, the hotel, your favorite coffee shop, work, or anywhere else that you want. Just like that, you'll be able to start working on your relationship for the better. Get started today.
Frequently asked questions (FAQs)
Does young love last?
According to one study, over 50% of people have been in some type of romantic relationship by age 15. Whether or not young love lasts depends entirely on the individuals and their circumstances. Some people are able to grow within their relationship as life goes on into adulthood, while others may inevitably grow apart as they grow older and change. Things like shifting goals, college, families moving, and learning more about themselves and what they want can all result in young love dissolving, though there are some who are able to grow together and stay together long-term beyond teenage-dom.
Is young love dangerous?
Young love, like with any love, can be dangerous if you and your partner are not setting healthy boundaries for yourselves. This can be really difficult for people who are young and in love to do, as they tend to be more naïve, less self-aware, and have less life experience in general to help them understand healthy boundaries. This is why some may consider it to be dangerous to be young and in love, and may consider teenagers in love too young to properly understand what love is or how to treat each other and themselves.
So long as you are ensuring that you and your partner respect each other, care about one another, communicate when something is bothering you (or, conversely, when something is positive!), whether young or not you’ll be on your way to fostering a relationship that can last.
Why is young love so intense?
Young love feels intense largely because teenagers and young adults don’t yet have much, if any, experience with romantic relationships, and they’re quite often very concerned with how others perceive them and fitting in. Having someone interested in you whom you’re also interested in can feel electrifying and wonderful, but when something goes somehow wrong, even just a small fight, it can feel horrible and like the end of the world. These polarized, powerful feelings become much easier to manage (and less intense) as the individuals grow older, gain more life experience, and gradually become less concerned with what others think of them.
Additionally, love and lust in general result in a dump of hormones and chemicals, like serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin. In teenagers, their bodies are not yet developed and all of these hormones and chemicals are rather all over the place anyway as they are in the process of maturing, so it can make any feelings associated with romantic relationships feel much more intense and confusing.
How do I know if I am in love?
Being in love means different things to different people. In general, though, it means you feel good about the person you’re with, you enjoy being with them, and you want to support them and help them to be happy and healthy. Being in love can feel euphoric and as though your chest is about to burst, it can feel calm and safe, it can feel scary and confusing, or sometimes all of these things at once (or perhaps often all of them at once if it’s young love!). If you feel valued, encouraged, and respected by your partner and you both enjoy being around each other, and particularly if you find yourself thinking about them often whether you’ve been together for a year or 10 years, you’re likely in love. Don’t overthink it too much – when you know, you know! Though some people may want to edit young love and try to influence your feelings, try to not worry so much about their thoughts and instead focus on your needs, the needs of your partner, and whether or not they mesh. Only you know if you’re in love, no one else.
How do you know if you are with the wrong person?
If you’re with the wrong person, you’ll likely know it deep down. There could be some form of persistent mistreatment going on, or maybe you just feel off with them. It could also be that you’re happy to be with someone, but maybe not that person in particular – this is especially common for young people experience their first relationship. If you don’t enjoy being around that person, either one or both of you don’t fully value or respect the other, or you just don’t feel much of any emotional or physical attraction to them, it’s possible that you’re with the wrong person. Just as with being in love, only you know if you’re with someone who is right for you or not.
Is there such thing as young love?
What age is young love?
How do young people find love?
What is another word for young love?
What is infatuation vs love?
- Previous Article
- Next Article