117 Deep Questions To Ask Your Friends

By Joanna Smykowski|Updated August 3, 2022
CheckedMedically Reviewed By Aaron Horn, LMFT

There are some friends you have known for a lifetime and others you have just met. Some may be considered close to you as a family; they feel like your brother, sister, or cousin. Others you see potential in – maybe with these friendships, you need time to nurture and grow..

In life, friendships are important. They are the people with whom you choose to surround yourself. When it comes to family, you get what you are born into. You may or may not get along with your family, and for many people, being with family can be more a source of stress than an exciting thing. Friends are people who have similar interests as you; you could have met them through school, work, or doing your favorite hobby. Some friends you met when you are young, and then you grow into different people and lose touch, which is a normal part of life. The friendships that you keep helps ease the stress of other aspects of life. Friends can get you through a day of work and a lot of other stressful periods in life. They can help you get through a future and previous relationship: the start, the middle, and the end. And while friends are great to backboard against for ideas and life advice, if you need someone to talk to about your relationships, you can also seek professional help.

Strengthen Your Friendships
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When it comes to any relationship, the connection and bond grow with time. There is always that desire to get to know each other better or look for ways to bond more. Relationships of any kind go through different growth phases, whether it’s a friend or romantic partner. The people involved will not get to know everything about one another in one day.

How To Get To Know Someone

One of the most powerful and surest ways to get to know someone is by asking intentional questions. One way to help yourself connect easily and effectively with other people is by asking the right questions. This can change your life and also help you to know how to harness each relationship. Asking deep questions can be very instrumental in enhancing your existing relationships to grow and build new ones. Also, knowing which deep questions to ask is more like a secret weapon, especially in social situations. You can choose to memorize some of your favorites or have a list of deep questions to ask on your phone, and you pull them out whenever the need arises. That way, you will rarely be at a loss for words in your relationships or any gathering you find yourself.

However, it is important to consider the person(s) you are having the conversation with, your gut feeling, the mood or tone of the conversation, and the goal. This way, you will know which questions to use per time and not ask the wrong questions to throw people off-guard or turn them off. Read on to learn more about deep questions to ask a guy or girl to get to know them better. You can learn more about this skill in online therapy.

Close Friendships: Is There Anything Left To Ask?

Even in the closest of friendships, there are always still new things to discover about one another and become a better friend. Whether you feel as if you know your friends as well as you know yourself, or it is a fresher friendship, there are likely still many deep personal questions to ask each other.

In most cases, building effective communication and bonds between friends depend on finding the right questions to ask. You may think you already know so much about your closest friends, but you would be surprised at how much deeper you can still go and the many things you can still learn about one another that you don’t already know- from the serious to the silly things. If you are spending quality time together at dinner, on vacation, or just hanging out, you can ask your friends deep questions that will help you find out about each other. Here is a list of 117 deep questions to ask your friends.

117 Deep Questions To Ask Your Friends:

  1. What makes you feel unstoppable?
  2. How do you see me?
  3. What emotion do you experience the most?
  4. If you could do anything for the rest of your life in the entire world today, what would that be?
  5. Do you think you’re brave?
  6. What makes you feel super loved?
  7. Do you think people fall in love because the right person has arrived, or because the timing is right (regardless of whom the person is that they fall in love with)?
  8. What do you want people to feel when they’re around you?
  9. What is one dream you’ve never said out loud?
  10. What bad habits do you lie the most about?
  11. If you had to change your name, then which one would be new?
  12. What makes you feel most alive?
  13. When do you feel you’re most vulnerable?
  14. What do you think makes me smile?
  15. Is it easy for you to show yourself love or speak kindly to yourself?
  16. What annoys you the most about people in three words?
  17. What scares you the most?
  18. What is more important to you in a dream job – status, power, or money?
  19. Is there anything you see inside of yourself you’re not sure of?
  20. What is that one embarrassing moment you have not told anyone yet?
  21. What is the nickname that your friends have given you? What does it mean?
  22. Are you more afraid of death or not living?
  23. Where would you like to be in 5 years?
  24. Do you want kids? If so, would you prefer having a baby without a partner or a partner without a baby?
  25. What was the biggest mistake that impacted you the most in your life?
  26. What type of relationship did/do you have with your parents?
  27. Would you be with someone who doesn’t have the same personal beliefs as you?
  28. How would your best friends describe you?
  29. Do you usually follow your heart, head, or a gut feeling?
  30. Do you prefer dating just one person and see where it goes or dating multiple people until you decide?
  31. How would you rank the following in importance: family, career, love life?
  32. What are the qualities you’re looking for in someone you want to grow old with?
  33. What are you most grateful for in your life?
  34. If you could change anything about your past, what would it be?
  35. Where do you think you will be ten years from now?
  36. What’s the one thing you would like to change about yourself today, and why?
  37. Where do you go when you need some inspiration?
  38. Who is the first person you call when you’re in trouble?
  39. What is the most memorable experience that you’ve done with someone?
  40. Would you put your family or your friends first if you had to choose one?
  41. Why did your last romantic relationship end and what did this relationship teach you about emotional compatibility?
  42. Who was your favorite cartoon character when you were a kid?
  43. What is the best advice you’ve ever been given?
  44. If you could marry anyone in the world, who would it be and why?
  45. If a crystal ball told you that you only had one year to live, what would you change in your life?
  46. What is your greatest fear?
  47. Do you think confessions make a relationship stronger?
  48. Did you ever judge someone for the dark secrets they told you?
  49. What has been the best phase in your life thus far?
  50. If you could choose one superpower, what would it be and why?
  51. What is your favorite childhood memory about a favorite teacher?
  52. What would you do if your parents raised concerns about your partner?
  53. Are you still in touch with your childhood friends?
  54. What do you do when you’re angry?
  55. What is your biggest regret in life so far?
  56. What was your favorite romantic moment, and why?
  57. What are your beliefs on God?
  58. Do you believe in soul mates from a past life?
  59. How long does it take you to trust someone?
  60. If you had to move to a deserted island without your friends and family, would you do it?
  61. What are some things that you wished people knew about you?
  62. Do you believe that life after death is possible?
  63. If you got into an argument with your best friend over your lover when they aren’t around, would you stand up for your lover?
  64. What’s your philosophy in life?
  65. What’s the one thing you would like to change about yourself?
  66. Are you religious or spiritual?
  67. If you were given three things to make you happy, what would these be?
  68. Would you ever take back someone who cheated?
  69. What was the most important lesson of your life?
  70. What was the greatest struggle of your life?
  71. Is what you’re doing now what you always wanted to do growing up?
  72. What are your favorite songs, books, or movies of all time, and why did they speak to you so much?
  73. What makes you feel accomplished?
  74. What is a relationship deal-breaker for you?
  75. Are you more into looks or brains?
  76. Do you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert?
  77. Which parent are you closer to, and why?
  78. What lies do you most often tell yourself?
  79. Would you relocate for love?
  80. Have you ever written in a journal?
  81. What legacy do you want people to remember about you after you’re gone?
  82. Do you think the present is better than 50 years ago? Why?
  83. What advice would you give to the current younger generation?
  84. What’s the most extreme example of poverty you have seen?
  85. What do a lot of parents do that screws up their kids?
  86. What kind of parent do you think you will be?
  87. What life-changing event have you experienced?
  88. Who is that one person you can talk to about just anything?
  89. What is the weirdest thing you have ever eaten?
  90. Do you usually stay friends with your exes?
  91. How do you feel about sharing your password with your partner?
  92. Is there such a thing as being ready for marriage?
  93. Have you ever lost someone close to you?
  94. What is your idea of a perfect date?
  95. If you are in a bad mood, do you prefer to be left alone or have someone to cheer you up?
  96. Which fictional character do you most relate to and why>
  97. What’s the ideal weekend for you?
  98. What do you think of having good friends of the opposite sex?
  99. When was the last time you broke someone’s heart?
  100. What are you most thankful for?
  101. Do you believe in second chances, and if so, why?
  102. How would you describe your first crush?
  103. What’s a guilty pleasure that people always misunderstand about you?
  104. Would you rather take a trip to the beach, the mountains, or an amusement park?
  105. What is something you have learned from your previous relationships?
  106. Do you judge a book by its cover?
  107. Are you more of a morning or night person?
  108. What is the craziest thing you've ever done?
  109. Are you confrontational?
  110. What are your thoughts on online dating or tinder?
  111. What’s on your bucket list this year?
  112. When have you felt your biggest adrenaline rush?
  113. What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done, and would you do it again?
  114. If you could do anything knowing you would not fail, what would you do?
  115. If a genie granted you three wishes right now, what would you wish for?
  116. What’s your biggest regret in life?
  117. What do you think about when you’re by yourself?

For additional ideas, try searching online for “deep questions to ask your friends.” There are various websites that offer examples of deep questions and conversation starters.

Strengthen Your Friendships

Whether you’re having drinks with the guys or a dinner date with your girls, these questions are sure to make any friend hang out interesting, and you may bond over your shared answers. Deep conversations can be intense, but the good thing about them is that they can be incredibly rewarding. While you are discovering quite a lot of new things about the other person, you would discover that you can also discover many new things about yourself. This is because diving into deep questions can give us a better perspective. They help us to understand people and why they act the way they do.

These questions could lead to other interesting questions, and hopefully a deep, insightful, and bonding conversation for you and your friends. Through the course of these discussions, you can form deep connections that you would not get from light-hearted chats. This doesn’t mean the small talks are not needed either; it means that there should be time and place for these big talks. Deep questions help you genuinely understand one another deeply and reflectively; you will all discover or better understand each other’s personal interests, your thought patterns, your drive, and other fun facts that you previously may not have known. This way, you move your friendship beyond the shallow level. Your knowledge of one another becomes broadened.

 

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