Free Premarital Counseling Vs. Paid Premarital Counseling

Updated March 25, 2024by Regain Editorial Team
“When enlisting help from a professional it is always important to do your research and consider their credentials. Whether free or not, finding someone with the preferred experience will make sure they are a good fit for you. Whatever choice you make, enlisting the help of a counselor is a healthy and wise choice before your marriage begins.” - Ryan Smith, LPC, NCC

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Should you consider free premarital counseling or paid counseling, or is there a difference at all? When it comes down to it, a lot of people that are even thinking about premarital counseling are looking at ways to save some money. They assume that they don't need to pay for something if they can get it free, and so they opt for a counseling session that's completely free, expecting to get the same quality as they would get with a more expensive course. Seeing the prices that come up for those paid courses also makes them second guess whether they should even get counseling in the first place.

If you are head over heels in love, then premarital counseling may seem like a waste of time. All that matters is that you're in love and you can withstand anything, so as long as you have each other. That's a wonderful and idealistic attitude to have. But that seems to be the attitude that everyone has in the beginning. Unfortunately, the divorce rate in the United States is a daunting 50 percent of failed marriages. That means it's extremely important for you to look for ways to help improve your chances and make sure that you and your partner are going to be one of the many couples that do make it a long way down this road.

It's easy to understand why some young couples are interested in some kind of premarital counseling-especially since schools no longer seem to teach homemaking skills or financial management courses. These life lessons are just as important as a career, or at least they are if a couple wishes to have a happy and stress-free family life. Couples who want to make their relationship work will generally seek out premarital counseling because they don't feel like they know enough about what a marriage is going to look like or what they're going to face when they do get married.

Couples who don't inherit wealth may find it advantageous to save money and seek out free premarital counseling, rather than invest their income in paid lessons or professional "premarital counseling." These couples want to make sure that they are getting the counseling, but they don't know how they're going to afford a paid course or they don't understand why they need to bother with a paid course if they can get something for free. After all, if it's considered premarital counseling, it must all be the same right? At least, that's the thought process for a lot of couples.

Does free premarital counseling work?



The problem is that free counseling is always a risky endeavor. Where do these free resources come from? Practically all professional counseling services, online or in person, need to pay their bills, and so they charge a minimum flat rate or hourly rate, depending on the time spent with the client(s). Free services are usually volunteers. This means they may come from bloggers, chat rooms, personal ads, and email groups, social media, and YouTube stars who are more than happy to give their advice.

One great thing about this is that you're going to get some resources and some knowledge from people who have been there and who have experienced these things. These are people who are married or who have been married and know the struggles and the joys associated with it. They're going to give you their firsthand experiences and the things that worked and didn't work for them, which can help you along your way and help you figure out more of what you need in your relationship to be successful. But they're not going to be everything you need to know.

The problem is that these are all anecdotal sources of information, and love and marriage is not a one size fit all issue. These amateurs may mean well, but their advice is not guaranteed to work, nor is it even guaranteed to be safe. You run the risk of accepting really bad advice, especially if you don't know the person dispensing this free information. Not only that, but you're not getting something that you can guarantee is going to apply to your situation at all. Maybe they had different kinds of problems than you, and your partner might be facing, or they may not touch on the issues that you're concerned about.

There are certainly some free resources that can be helpful to you and your partner. Maybe you're going to go to the library and check out some books or watch videos that your counselor recommends about different issues. There are all sorts of different services that you can check out, and some counselors might have free resources as well. Maybe they have questionnaires or discussion topics that you and your partner should focus on or consider. They might have short courses or study guides that you can look at for free as well. These are resources that are going to help you and your partner along, but they shouldn't take the place of true counseling sessions.

Take advantage of some of the free resources that you can get, but make sure that you're wary and that you're very discerning when it comes to what type of content you're going to be absorbing. You want to make sure that you and your partner aren't taking any of the bad advice to heart. That means you may want to talk with a paid counselor about which free resources are good and which ones you might want to stay away from. Chances are they can give you a whole lot of tips and advice about what services they believe are good and are going to compliment your sessions.

The benefits of paid counseling

The advantage to paid counseling over free premarital counseling is that the advice comes from a trusted authority-namely a licensed counselor, and typically one experienced in family therapy. The Mayo Clinic states that trustworthy counselors should be state-licensed as well as certified by an organization like the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT). Licensing and certification require not only supervised work experience but also graduate or postgraduate degrees.

These are individuals who have gone to school and done a whole lot of work to be certified as a marriage counselor. These are people who are not just giving you information that they expect to be one-size-fits-all. They're going to evaluate your specific situation and talk to you about what you and your partner are going through. They're going to talk to you about the relationship that you're in and what you think and feel about that relationship. They're also going to help you understand where you're excelling and where you and your partner could face some challenges going forward.

Not only that but these individuals have worked with other couples and have a proven track record of helping couples to overcome their marriage problems or to turn their pre-marriage counseling into a successful relationship going forward. These are the kinds of stories that you want, and this is the kind of information that you want to get from your premarriage counselor. The idea is that you're going to be getting what you pay for here because you're getting real advice from someone who is trained to provide it.

Your premarriage counselor is going to talk with you about several different issues, and they'll even help you with areas that you may not have thought of but that a lot of different couples have trouble with once they do get married. They'll be able to walk you through things like how to handle disagreements in the future and how to make decisions as a couple. They're going to have no problem teaching you about different issues and different concerns. They'll also be able to recommend different resources that you can use at any time during your relationship.

What's better than free premarital counseling? The certified online option!

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Strengthen your marriage's foundation in online therapy

Online counseling from career professionals, such as that offered by Regain.us, focus on teaching life lessons, household management, and conflict resolution to avoid the arguments that often break down marriage. Lessons by these counselors focus on showing mutual respect, more effectively communicating with each other, and learning the pitfalls that can compromise a happy marriage. If you want your relationship to last, why not get professional help and "fireproof" your marriage for the long-term?

If you're looking for high-quality counseling, you want to make sure you're talking with someone who is certified and someone that you're paying to provide you with that quality. With Regain, you're going to have that with no problem. Not only that, but you're going to have a counselor that you can trust to give you the best possible advice to keep you and your partner on the road to a successful relationship. There are plenty of different topics that you'll need to discuss, so make sure that you're finding someone you can be comfortable with and that you're going to be as honest with as possible.

No matter what you're looking for, you're going to love the fact that this service takes care of absolutely everything online. You won't need to worry about how you're going to make it to a session or what you're going to do once you get there because you get to stay right where you are. Log on from anywhere with an internet connection, and before you know it, you're going to be having the sessions that you need without the discomfort of having to go to a therapist’s office to get it.

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