Is It Important To Always Send A Goodnight Text?

By: Robert Porter

Updated December 15, 2020

Medically Reviewed By: Whitney White, MS. CMHC, NCC., LPC

When you care about your girlfriend or boyfriend very much, it's normal to want to talk to them often. In the early stages of a relationship, it is normal to feel like you can’t wait to talk to your partner. Some relationships have different "rules" or expectations about communication, though. It might be normal for one couple to text and talk every single day. Another couple might go an entire week without calling or texting, and for them this might be normal. If you're wondering whether it is always important to send a good night text, then the answer is that it depends. Figuring out whether that is important for your relationship is up to you and your partner.

Goodnight Texts Can Be Important In Relationships
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What Is a Good Night Text?

If you do not live with your partner, you may want to wish them good night. A good night text is a kind way to let your partner know that you’re thinking about them. These text messages can take many forms. Some examples of a sweet good night text include:

Sweet dreams
Night my love, Goodnight love, or Good night my love
Night darling or Good night darling
Night dear
Sleep tight
Have a wonderful night
Good night sweetheart
Goodnight honey
Pleasant dreams
Good night my treasure
Hope you have a restful sleep
Have good dreams tonight
Can’t wait to talk tomorrow or Can’t wait to see you again!
Good night love of my life or Hope the love of my life has pleasant dreams

You could also send some of your favorite love quotes as a romantic good night text. These kinds of text messages can help strengthen the bond between you and your partner. A romantic good night text will not only comfort them, but make them think of you each time the moon shines. Something as simple as “I love you good night” can be effective as well. Another great way to show affection and remind your partner that you care is to send good morning texts in addition to good night texts. However, you may not be sure if you should send good night texts. The following may help you determine whether or not you should wish your partner sweet dreams at night, and whether you should expect good night text messages back.

How Do You Regularly Communicate?

If you're trying to determine how important it is to send a good night text, then you should first start thinking about how you regularly communicate. Do you talk to your girlfriend or boyfriend every single day? Do you usually wish them a good morning? If so, then sending a good night text might be appropriate. Good night text messages can be a cute and sweet way to show that you are thinking of your significant other before you close your eyes.

If you're offended by your partner not sending good night texts very often, then maybe you should try to look at things from their perspective. Some people forget to do little things, such as send good night texts, due to being very busy or tired. If your significant other works a very physical job, then he or she might be exhausted by the time it gets close to bedtime. The fact that they didn't text you good night doesn't necessarily mean that they don't care. Your partner may have desperately needed restful sleep and didn’t think to send any good night texts.

You'll also find that some people don't place as much significance on actions like good night texts. If your partner isn't someone who sends a lot of texts, then you probably shouldn't expect him or her to send you sweet good night texts all the time. Someone who loves to text is going to be a different story, and they probably will send you good night texts. It all comes down to your relationship dynamic and how you communicate. If having a good night text exchange is important to you, discuss it with your partner.

If You Want to Send a Good Night Text, Then You Should

Keep in mind that there is no harm in sending a sweet good night message before bed each night. If it makes you feel good to send a cute or romantic good night text, then you should do so. Chances are, your partner is going to enjoy receiving the good night texts. Good night text messages can be very romantic, and it's something that can make someone feel like they're loved and cared for. You can always send a good morning text as well, but if you can’t wait that long, you should feel comfortable sending those good night text messages. The sweet spot you want to hit is one where you send a text when it feels like it’s in flow and you want to do it but don’t feel a sense of obligation to do it. If you know it’s something that your partner values and you’ve talked about it, sending a goodnight text is a great way to express affection, which is an important part of a relationship. 

When to Worry If Your Partner Doesn't Send A Good Night Text

Normally, you shouldn't worry much at all if your partner doesn't send you a “good night my love” text every night. They might have just forgotten or became too tired to stay awake. But if wishing a wonderful night is the norm for you and your partner, it might be strange for this behavior to stop. Once you are back in contact with your boyfriend or girlfriend, speak up about any concerns you might have and talk about the change with them. It may be that a change in communication patterns is needed due to work schedule or busy times ahead, or it may have been a fluke. Honest and open communication is important. If it’s something you feel obligated to do nightly, a goodnight text can become less special, which is why many people reserve them for when they’re talking right before bed and don’t necessarily send them out of the blue on a nightly basis. Even so, verbalizing the reason for the change in communication is crucial so that your partner will feel secure and will know that nothing’s wrong.

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Fun Good night Texts For Him

If you're looking for some fun good night texts for him that will grab his attention, then there are many different options that you can consider. One idea is to try to be romantic and send him something that will show him that he is on your mind. A good night text such as "wish you were in bed with me, handsome" might wind up being just the thing. It's just a bit flirty and it shows that you're longing for your partner romantically. You can also send love quotes to them if that’s more your style. Love quotes can be found by searching on the interest, or you can take them from a shared favorite movie, book, or song.

Some couples even send pictures when they're feeling a bit amorous. Taking a bedtime selfie in your favorite sleepwear doesn't always have to be sexy. A pic of you in your comfortable pajamas might remind him of how good it feels to be cuddled up in bed together before drifting off to sleep. Depending on the type of tone that you want, this might be the perfect type of good night text to send the special man in your life. Another idea is to tell your partner "sweet dreams." It's a tried and true good night text that is sure to make your partner smile. Sending good night messages can make you feel happy as well, and will help you sweet dreams too as you close your eyes. He may start to feel like he can’t wait to see that romantic good night message from you.

Remember That Good Communication Is the Key to A Successful Relationship

Whether or not you send romantic good night texts all the time, it's important to note that communication is the key to a successful relationship. You need to be able to communicate with your partner so that you can be on the same page about good night texts. Talking to your partner about any concerns that you might have is important. It's also good to be able just to know that you can turn to your significant other when you need comfort. Discussing your concerns and feelings can’t wait too long, otherwise negative emotions begin to build.

Working on your communication involves being willing to open up. Try to be open and transparent in your relationship so that you can build a bond that is based on honesty. This gives your relationship a firm foundation, and it helps you to make room to grow together in the future. If communication is an issue for both or either of you, counseling can help. You can also learn more about communication for couples from books and expert sources online. Some couples find communication worksheets or exercises helpful. 

Communicating with your partner is about much more than just sending sweet good night text messages. It's about tearing down emotional barriers and being willing to place trust in someone. Over time, you should be more comfortable doing this. If your partner is the one who needs help with being more emotionally available, then try to spend time working on things with him or her. Good night messages may be a good way to start.

Just Try Not to Smother Your Partner

Some people can get a bit obsessive about communication, and this can lead to romantic partners trying to monopolize their lover's time. This isn't healthy, and you need to know how to set boundaries in your relationship. If you find yourself texting your partner day and night without reciprocation, or if your anxiety makes it so you can’t wait for their response, you should talk to your partner. You can't expect your partner to adhere to a guideline for communication that you haven't both discussed and agreed on, and that includes good night texts.

Check in with your partner about communication expectations and discuss what you both prefer or feel best with. Discuss times when communication may feel like more of an obligation or when it might be best to hang back a bit, like when one of you are with family or friends for a special event. Unless there’s a situation where one partner is expectant of a high level of communication and gets upset when it’s not there, this conversation doesn’t need to be a big sit-down talk. Instead, it can be as simple saying, “hey, while I’m on vacation with my family, I’m going to have my phone down most of the time. I love you so much, and I can’t wait to see you when I get back.” It certainly depends on the partnership, though. If your partner is used to constant or near-constant communication, you haven’t set this boundary in the past and ended up speaking to them all of the time, only to resent it or wish you’d gotten to be in the moment with your family or friends, or if they get upset, worried, or even fearful when you’re away and are a bit less responsive, which is common in those with anxious attachment styles, a bigger discussion might be appropriate. Provide your partner with reassurance by telling them that you love them, can’t wait to spend time with them when you get back, and that if you don’t reply right away or until the evening when you’re done spending time with family, it isn’t at all personal and is only because you want to respect your family’s time by putting your phone away and living in the moment. You might even express good times for them to call, or they might ask you when it’s a good time to call so that you’re 100% clear with each other.

A little bit of distance can sometimes be good for a relationship. If you’re sending love quotes all the time, they may begin to lose their impact. It helps you to appreciate the time that you have together much better. How much distance is healthy for a relationship can be tough to determine. Try to find a comfortable medium that works for both you and your partner through careful discussion about it.

Goodnight Texts Can Be Important In Relationships
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Online Counseling Is There for You as Well

Online counseling is going to be there for you as well if your relationship is ever in need of some help. You can reach out to licensed professionals to get help for your relationship when you feel like you're stuck in a rut. If you're worried that your communication isn't up to par, then you can work on that in counseling. Online couples counseling is very convenient, and it allows you to work on issues at times that are convenient for you. Good luck with your partner, and sweet dreams!

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

What do you say in a goodnight text?

There are many different things you can say in a good night text. Some simple examples include “Good night my love”, “sleep tight” “love you good night” or “sweet dreams”. Some romantic examples are “I’ll be dreaming about you tonight”. You can also be flirty and tell your partner that you wish they were in bed with you, or talk about how good it feels to lie next to him or her.

What is a cute way to say goodnight?

Some cute ways to say good night are “Sweet dreams”, “Night my love”, “Good night darling”, “Good night sweetheart”. You might also say, “goodnight my princess” “good night my angel,” “or “good night my queen.” If you have pet names for each other, it can be incredibly cute to use it when you say good night, whether that’s in person or via text. Using a nickname or pet name makes it more personalized than saying, “good night dear” or “good night my queen,” though those are sweet options, too. If it’s in person, a kiss on the forehead or laying down to cuddle is a nice touch. If it’s via text, you might add an emoji, meme, or gif to make someone smile. For example, if you text your girlfriend “good night my queen,” you can put a crown emoji by the text. When your partner has a rough day, or when you simply want to do a little something to make them happy, something like that can go a long way.

How do you say goodnight in romantic?

You can call your partner the love of your life in your good night text. For example, you can say “Dreaming about the love of my life tonight”, or “hope the love of my life has sweet dreams.” Sweet, simple texts like, “good night my queen,” “goodnight love,” or “goodnight sweetheart” go a long way.” You could also send your partner your favorite love quotes from movies, books, or songs to let them know you’re thinking about them. It’s even better if you both love the media that you got the quote from. Gifs and photos from movies or TV shows are great options, too!

How do I tell him goodnight?

Don’t think too much about sending a good night text. Chances are, he is going to love seeing that message from you, and he’s going to wish he was falling asleep next to you. A simple “good night darling”, “sweet dreams”, “goodnight, babe,” or “rest easy baby” is a cute and kind way to wish your partner a good night.

What texts do guys like?

Guys appreciate getting a text from you, especially if it is something as sweet as a good night text. Many men love getting these kinds of messages, but it is against the status quo to ask for them. Do not psych yourself out when choosing what message to send. You can say “Sweet dreams”, “Night my love”, “Good night darling”, “Good night sweetheart”. You could also be flirty and tell him you wish he was in bed with you or talk about how you want to cuddle.

What should I text him at night?

You can say “Sweet dreams”, “Night my love”, “Good night darling”, “Good night sweetheart”. He will appreciate knowing that you are thinking about him, and he will start to think about you too. You could also be flirty and tell him you wish he was in bed with you or talk about how much you want to cuddle him. Men love getting romantic messages, but they don’t always feel comfortable expressing that desire. Don’t worry too much about sending the right message. Any good night message from you is going to make him smile.

How do you text goodnight to your crush?

Texting someone you love goodnight is different than texting a new crush. If you don’t want to be overt about your crush, you can send him or her a message like “sweet dreams”, “have a wonderful night”, or “can’t wait to talk tomorrow”. These are all good night messages, but they are a little bit sweeter and flirtier than just a standard “good night”. It also lets them know that you enjoy speaking to them without giving it all away! 

What can you say instead of good night?

There are many different things you can say instead of good night. For example, you could wish them “sweet dreams” or “pleasant dreams”. You can also say something like, “I’ll see you in my dreams tonight.” Get creative; think about what you would like to hear as you are drifting off to sleep. Chances are, your partner would love to hear the same thing.

Should I text him goodnight every night?

That depends on your relationship with him. Do you text him every day? Do you rely on texting for most of your communication? Does he actively respond and engage with you when you message him? If so, there’s nothing wrong with sending a good night message every night. If you don’t rely on texting as much, then a good night text every single evening may be overbearing. However, it’s possible that your partner looks forward to receiving those good night texts, even if you don’t text very often. Notice how he responds to these messages. Does he say something cute back to you, and does he always respond? If he falls asleep before receiving the message, does he text you good morning when he wakes up? If he doesn’t engage with these messages, you may find it’s best to text him good night every once in a while. When in doubt, the best thing to do is talk to your partner to determine what makes you both comfortable.

What's a sweet goodnight message?

There are many romantic and sweet ways to wish your partner good night. You can call your partner the love of your life in your good night text. For example, you can say “Dreaming about the love of my life tonight”, or “hope the love of my life has sweet dreams.” You could also send your partner your favorite love quotes from movies, books, or songs to let them know you’re thinking about them. It’s even better if you both love the media that you got the quote from. If you want to find a wealth of unique ideas for sweet goodnight messages, you can search for “sweet goodnight texts for girlfriend” or “romantic goodnight texts for your partner.” Additionally, remember that “I love you good night” is always a sweet, simple way to show your partner affection and wish them a good night’s rest.


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