How To Sexually Attract Men: 8 Tips For Making Yourself Irresistible

By: Sarah Khan

Updated March 21, 2021

Medically Reviewed By: Lauren Guilbeault

One of the biggest mysteries of all time is knowing how to attract a man sexually. Women worldwide spend their free time trying to figure out how to gain the attention of men. Women dress up, wear makeup, style their hair, get their nails done, and wear high, uncomfortable heels, all in an attempt to attract the opposite sex in the hopes that they will like them and find them beautiful enough. Women try hard to stand out among other women, view others as competition, and seek to be unique, stylish, mysterious, and sexy. They try to reach unattainable levels of what is conventionally 'beautiful,' as defined by media and pop culture.


Magazines, articles, and books all claim to have the secret to reeling a man in, yet somehow, women everywhere are still sitting around single, unhappy, and trying their utmost to get a man's attention. So, here's the million-dollar question: how do sexually attract a man? What is it that he's looking for, and how do you reach those standards? What makes him want you and not the competition?

Appear Feminine

This may not align with modern thinking, where women should feel empowered to be whoever they are and look however they want without losing merit. However, evolutionarily, men are more attracted to women who appear more feminine. Why? According to evolution, men look for women who appear healthy, strong, and fertile, because by nature, what they are looking for, is the optimal mate. Men don't think, "oh wow, she looks very fertile." Instead, their brains process this instinct by looking for feminine, womanly features because of their association with having enough female hormone supply.

By searching for female mates that appear to have sufficient or abundant female hormones, the male ensures that he has the chance to have the largest number of offspring. Why is this important? By nature, we are all programmed to want to produce the most offspring to carry on our line. Males, whether they actively realize it or not, are searching for this in a mate.

Men are attracted to a low waist to hip ratio, full lips, symmetrical faces, feminine facial features, and a slim, healthy body. When it comes to being slim, of course, this is not always the case for women. Some research suggests that being attracted to slim body types is just a cultural phenomenon, as there are still many instances where men prefer curvier women. Another theory suggests that men are attracted to heavier women when food is scarce and to slim women when there is an abundance.

Appear Kind And Nurturing

Evolutionary psychology suggests that the primary reason we are searching for partners is to find the perfect mate. What is the perfect mate? By nature, a woman looks for a strong, healthy man who would be able to protect her and her offspring, as well as provide. Men, on the other hand, are looking for mates. They have a natural urge to procreate with the most healthy and fertile females to carry on their line, their legacy. As such, one way to attract a man is to show them your kind, nurturing, naturally mothering side. They may not even be consciously aware, but this would leave the impression that you would be a good mate, a good mother, which would make you appear more attractive. Showing them that you would be a good person to care for offspring creates a natural attraction.

Radiate Youthfulness


We understand that you cannot change your age, but there's a difference between being young and youthful. Being youthful is simply exemplifying the behaviors of the characteristics of young people. Youthfulness has more to do with your attitude and demeanor. Men are not necessarily on the prowl for younger women, but they prefer youthful, social, exciting, and spontaneous women. Even if you are on the older side, you can easily adapt these behaviors and become more attractive to men. If you're wondering how you can start appearing more youthful and become more attractive to men, first and foremost, stop following any societal rules about how you 'should' act at your age. Dress a bit younger, take the time and care to do your makeup and hair. However, remain authentic to the person that you are. Your genuine and youthful spirit will surely attract men.

Be Confident

Many women believe that men are attracted to the 'damsel in distress.' To some extent, this is true. Inherently, men like to feel wanted and needed. They enjoy having a purpose and being protectors. Again, that's just evolution. However, since primitive times, we have continued to evolve, so that paradigm has shifted a bit since.

Instead of appearing completely helpless or completely overconfident (someone who doesn't need a man), try finding a balance and adopt the idea of feminine confidence. This begins with understanding your self-worth, believing that you deserve a good relationship, and being proud of what you would bring to that relationship. First, know what you want. If you meet a man who doesn't reach your expectations, let him go. There's no need to settle immediately. Don't hide your personality and know your value because you are exactly who you were meant to be. However, at the same time, please don't overdo it with your confidence. Still allow a man to open a door, buy a drink, or help you with something you need. That balance will make him feel wanted while still knowing that he's chosen a woman who is sexy in her confidence.

Express An Interest


Men are surprisingly needy without even realizing it. Simply giving a man your attention and showing him an interest in whatever he is doing or saying is enough to start building attraction on his end. Men enjoy feeling empowered, and having an audience is a minor way in which they do. The more attention you give a man, the more attracted he will become, simply because you have given him a platform and validated his importance. If you don't seem interested enough, he will likely move on and continue looking for someone else. However, balance is key. Make sure you don't go overboard and participate in the conversation yourself. To show him your interest listen when he speaks, respond accordingly without drawing too much attention away from him, ask questions to show you're actively listening, and find ways to make physical contact with him (a touch on the hand, a small pat on the shoulder).

Express A Positive Attitude

Men, by nature, are inclined to move from woman to woman, maximizing their chances of producing the most and the healthiest offspring to carry on their legacy. Monogamy is a very modern idea when compared with how we are wired naturally. Since men are not designed to become as attached as women, it's important to keep their interests by having a positive attitude. They do not want to deal with drama, anger, frustration, etc. These are complex emotions, and they know they can move on rather than deal with them. Men are attracted to positive women because it is simply easier. A bubbly personality that appears overall carefree is extremely attractive to men. Resist sharing any negative thoughts that come to mind. It will drive a man away. On the other hand, if you see the man is negative, quickly try to change the trajectory.

Raise Your Shoulder And Arch Your Back

Arching your back reflects lordosis behavior, which is essentially where you stick your bottom out. Almost all mammal females do this during estrus, signifying male mammals that their mating attempts have been a success. Naturally, men are looking for indications that a woman is interested in him and will sexually receive him. This motion takes a lot of guesswork out of it as it plays a very primitive part of the mind. Seeing that motion will make you appear sexually attractive because a man will feel that you were signaling for him.



Men are attracted to happy women who appear pleasant. Smiling is warm and inviting, giving them an invitation. Men are especially more intimidated now than ever before to approach a woman. Smiling at him can provide the encouragement he needs to come up to you, and a warm, welcoming smile is always attractive. It is suggested that you wear red lipstick related to how our primitive ancestors would attract males. Our primate ancestors would attract males by showing off their swollen vulvas. As we are now upright on two legs, this is much less of a practical option, and evolution has adapted this attraction to another set of lips, better exposed.

While there is no question that humans have evolved into sophisticated, complex beings, we still have many primitive roots. They have been adapted into very different behaviors, but the ideas remain the same. Men are looking for the ideal candidate to procreate with. That's simply what they are wired to do. If you are trying to attract a man, show him that you can be just that. Show him your caring, nurturing side, show him how feminine you are, and most importantly, feed his ego by showing an interest in him. Follow these tips, and you'll be sure to attract a man in no time. Are you interested in learning more about attraction? Visit to learn more about the psychology of attraction and what you can do to get yourself a man.

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