If you're looking for a "signs your marriage is over" quiz, there is a good chance that you have doubts about your marriage. The issues your marriage is facing may have you wondering: is it time to cut my losses or can we make it through these difficult times?
But how do you really know if your marriage is over? While an online or magazine publication quiz should certainly not be the reason you divorce your husband or wife, there may be some questions and answers on a quiz like this that can give you a bit of insight.
For example, thought-provoking questions might give you some topics to discuss with your partner or a counselor. These kinds of questions will not directly tell you if you should stay with your spouse or end the relationship, but they can be indicators of areas in need of improvement.
What questions can provide this kind of insight, and what will they determine for you and your relationship? Read on to learn more.
Do You Communicate Your Concerns Within the Marriage?
A major part of any successful relationship is communication. It can be difficult to learn within a marriage, but it is necessary to have the healthiest relationship possible. If you feel that your marriage is over but have failed to discuss the problems in your relationship, it is a failure to communicate that is likely the primary issue.
By communicating what is bothering you clearly and concisely, you and your spouse will approach the situation better and allow for improvement. Without verbally informing your partner about the way you feel, however, there is a chance they are completely unaware what’s going on.
Despite what many couples seem to believe, spouses cannot know their partner's thoughts by reading their mind. Deciding to end the marriage without attempting to fix the issues is likely a mistake, as those issues may very well be resolved.
Communicating means both partners voicing concerns and listening closely to the concerns of one another. It requires that both partners communicate any problems to make changes effectively. Statistically, many marriages that end in divorce are a result of poor communication. If this is a concern within your marriage, it may be necessary to consult a therapist or counselor trained in teaching you and your spouse to communicate and work on your issues as a team.
Are you truly unable to be happy in the marriage?
Were you ever really happy? What would it take to be happy again? By answering these questions, you can answer the main one: are you truly unable to be happy in the marriage? If it is impossible to imagine ever being happy with your spouse, you must speak to them about it. When your marriage is truly over, there will be no chance to fix this problem.
Figuring out exactly what is needed to be happy is key to this question. If your spouse doesn't know what you need, they will have difficulty in assisting you with achieving that happiness. Remembering that your happiness does not depend solely on another person is also an important factor.
If you are unhappy and there is nothing that your spouse can do to fix it, it may be necessary to work on yourself assigning the blame to your partner. Speaking with a counselor can be a helpful resource in determining the best route of action.
What Kinds of Feelings Come From the Thought of Ending the Marriage?
Approaching divorce can be incredibly painful, regardless of the state of one's marriage before the separation. If you are concerned with what it would feel like to be single once again, losing the intimacy of a marital relationship, or how you might find happiness again, these feelings are normal when considering ending your marriage.
However, some feelings may make you reconsider the idea of divorce. If you reminisce over the good times, what was it that made those moments good? Trying to recreate those moments or feelings might help you determine if the marriage is truly worth saving. If strong feelings occur when you think about past times with your spouse, it may be beneficial to explore those feelings and see if they can be regained.
Can You Handle the Tasks That Your Spouse has Always Done on Their Own?
This question should not make or break a marriage but is often present on quizzes regarding the end of a marriage. Perhaps your spouse always mowed the yard or shoveled the snow. If you are physically unable to do these tasks, does that mean you should stay with your partner solely for this reason? Not necessarily. In fact, staying with your spouse simply because they maintain the landscaping may be unhealthy.
However, answering this question will help bring to light each of the tasks for which your significant other takes responsibility. If you consider ending your marriage because your spouse doesn't do their part, listing their responsibilities might help you see how much they actually contribute.
Considering each of the items that your spouse takes care of might also bring light to your financial situation. If your partner is responsible for half of the bills, you must consider this. The cost of the divorce itself can also be very expensive. Again, this is not necessarily a reason to stay married, but it is certainly a contributing factor that needs some thought. This is especially true if your concerns within the marriage are financial.
Is The Relationship Salvageable?
Identifying the specific problems unique to your relationship are key to figuring out how to fix the marriage. By figuring out this piece of the puzzle, married couples have a way to begin saving their relationship.
When you think about the issues you are dealing with in your marriage but cannot determine how to fix them, or if it is even possible to fix them, consider seeing a marriage counselor before deciding that your marriage is over. In fact, if counseling is sought before making the determination, there is a greater chance of the marriage being saved.
Do You Still Love Your Spouse?
Perhaps one of the biggest mysteries to solve in a marriage that you are questioning is this: are you are still in love with your spouse? It can sometimes feel really confusing if you have children and still have some degree of love for your spouse but are no longer in love with them. However, even if you are no longer in love with your spouse, it doesn't mean the marriage has to end.
There are a variety of ways in which a couple can find that love again. It might take more one-on-one time with your partner or better communication to get to know the older version of the person you married. It might even require some professional help.
While falling out of love with the person you married can be difficult within the marriage, and most quizzes would lead you to believe it is the end of your marriage, it doesn't have to be. In truth, if both parties of the marriage are willing to improve the areas of concern and spend time together, improvement is always possible. Small improvements can have a huge impact when it comes to saving a marriage.
What insights have you gained?
Give time and thought to each question asked of you. While it is not necessary to read the quiz results, it is important to understand how those questions made you feel. It can be tricky to come to terms with those feelings. This is where the help of a counselor or therapist may be needed.
A counselor like those available through ReGain can help you to determine your deep-rooted feelings and if improvements can be made to make your marriage better. Learning to communicate effectively, defining the basis of your unhappiness (your marriage or perhaps something else in your life), understanding how you really feel about divorce, evaluating if you can manage without your partner, asking how the relationship might be saved, and deciding if you still love your spouse—these are all items that a counselor can assist you with. Working through these questions and feelings is crucial to understanding if your marriage is truly over.
If you have already taken a "signs your marriage is over" quiz and felt okay with the a negative result, this can be insightful information. If the quiz informed you that your marriage is “over,” and you felt angry, irritated, confused, or saddened, this may be an indicator that your marriage can still be saved. If this is the case, getting help from a marriage counselor can be beneficial before giving up on your marriage. By seeking professional help, you might find that your marriage is not over at all.
“My wife and I decided to give online couples counseling a go after finding traditional methods weren’t all that suited to our busy working and parenting lifestyle. Our counselor Donna Kemp has been amazing! We both feel she’s listened to us and given us the confidence to step out of our comfort zone to deal with problems that are easy to avoid. She is encouraging without being pushy. We’ve both responded very well to her and her methods and look forward to continuing on with Donna. Highly recommend!”
“Cris Roman saved my marriage. His approach to therapy taught my husband and I the skills we needed to change the way we communicated and the way we understood each other. He is very non-judgemental and helps each person make sense of the others' feelings and actions without taking sides or placing blame. His ability to make you feel heard while helping you to see and understand why your significant other is acting a certain way is phenomenal.”
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
What are the signs of a failing marriage?
Healthy marriages are characterized by traits such as communication, mutual respect, and affection. If you're looking for a marriage quiz or are searching for "save my marriage find help," "quiz marriage failing," "save my marriage find quiz marriage," "signs your marriage is over quiz marriage," or other similar terms, you may be thinking "how do I save my marriage?" or you might be wondering what the signs are that your relationship is showing signs of distress. While it’s not an extensive list and every couple is different, here are some signs of a struggling marriage:
If you're looking for a sign that your marriage is failing, that is an indicator in and of itself that something might be going on or that your marriage is showing signs of distress. When you notice that marriage shows signs of distress, it doesn't necessarily mean it's too late. Couples counseling can help couples who want to repair their relationship move towards a healthy, happy dynamic. You can get at-home marriage counseling by getting counseling online, or you can get outside of the home marriage counseling by seeing a provider near you.
When should you walk away from your marriage?
If they are abusive, it's time to walk away. If abuse is occurring, it is never acceptable, and there is never an excuse on the end of the person displaying abusive actions that will make it okay or passable. Contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) or visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline website. In the absence of abuse, you may decide to walk away after trying to work things out to no avail, determining that your wants and needs moving forward are too incompatible, or realizing that you would be unhappy if you stayed in the partnership. If you and your partner want to stay married and work toward a healthy marriage, help is available. Couples counseling boasts a high success rate and can be a game-changer when you love your spouse but have a relationship showing signs of distress. With the research in mind, for those wondering "how do I save my marriage?" or those seeking to have happier and healthier marriages, couples counseling or therapy is a viable step and potential solution. If you and your partner are willing to work together and are both invested in building and maintaining a healthy marriage, you're already part of the way there.
How do you know if your marriage is beyond repair?
First, if there's abuse, it is beyond repair. If there is not abuse, things may be more nuanced. This is a choice that only you and your partner can make. If those in a marriage find that they are too incompatible when it comes to the big stuff in a way that doesn't allow you to continue the relationship or that they are unhappy together after many attempts to work things out, these are two scenarios where a couple may decide to separate. Although a marriage quiz, signs your marriage is over the quiz, or a list of signs that your marriage shows signs of distress can provide you with insight, it doesn't necessarily mean that your marriage is beyond repair. If you are looking for signs your marriage is over quiz or are looking for signs your marriage is showing signs of distress; it's a signal that there is something to work on or discuss within your partnership. Seeing something that is occurring in your relationship in signs your marriage is over quiz marriage quiz or list of signs that your marriage is struggling can also give you the language to identify what's going on in your partnership, helping you determine what you need to work on to have a healthy marriage. If you and your partner are in the process of seeking support and you are thinking, "is it going to be possible to save my marriage?" or searching the web for terms like "save my marriage find help," there is hope. While a relationship with an adamant partner that they want a divorce is one to let go, again, if you're both invested, take it as a good sign.
How do you know if your marriage will last?
There is no way to determine with 100% certainty that a marriage will last in the most literal sense. However, some things predict a lasting marriage, and there are ways to navigate a marriage that will promote a lasting marriage. First, to stay married, show that you love your spouse. Affection is essential in any relationship, and it's known within the Gottman method, a couples therapy modality, as the antidote to contempt. You can show you love your spouse through compliments and other affirming words, actions, physical affection, and other means. Most people use a combination of ways of showing affection. Communication is another hallmark trait of a healthy marriage or partnership. Communication is essential not just because it allows you to say that you love your spouse verbally but because it allows you to work through conflict, share your needs, share your likes and dislikes, and so on. The desire to improve communication is a common reason couples go to counseling, and many of those struggling in their marriage find that working on communication is beneficial. Communication helps to foster emotional intimacy as well as conflict resolution skills and other beneficial traits and pursuits. Compatibility is also important, particularly for non-negotiables that may relate to areas of life such as where you want to live or if you do or do not want children. Everyone will have their own non-negotiables. They will certainly vary from person to person, so know that they are still valid even if your non-negotiables aren’t like everyone else’s. The same is true for what you’re willing to compromise on. Make sure that you’re true to yourself and that if you have a genuine non-negotiable, you’re taking it into account. If you aren’t married yet, it’s also crucial to look at these factors so that you and your partner can either come to a compromise or decide what to do if your needs don’t align.
What are the first signs of divorce?
Contempt is known as one of the top predictors of divorce. Other signs of divorce that you may notice early on are a lack of affection, no desire to spend time with one another, a lack of mutual respect, and a higher number of negative interactions than positive ones with your partner or spouse. You may feel more like roommates than partners, and overall, you might feel unhappy in the partnership. If those in a marriage find themselves showing signs of contempt toward one another, or if a marriage shows signs of distress in other ways, it is absolutely imperative to work through this concern. It is possible for those who currently have relationships showing signs of distress to build and maintain healthy marriages. Don't hesitate to reach out to a couples counselor or therapist who is versed in helping couples build and maintain healthy marriages and relationships. You can find a provider online, or you can search for someone in your local area. Either way, you deserve to get the help and support that you need.