Recovering From Being With A Cheater: Quotes For Strength And Healing

Experiencing infidelity can come with a sense of hurt, betrayal, and a range of other emotions. If your partner has been unfaithful, you may find yourself wondering how you can ever move forward. Just as relationships can be very personal, so are reactions to a partner cheating. Feelings may include shock, anger, sadness, grief, and even relief. It is possible to move on from infidelity and to find happiness in a healthy relationship. The quotes contained within this article may help you find the strength to move on from infidelity.

What qualifies as cheating?

Cheating can have many different definitions and technicalities that largely depend on the people in the relationship. For some, an emotional connection with someone outside of the relationship may be considered infidelity. Others may view unfaithfulness as being involved in a physical relationship with someone else. What exactly constitutes cheating may vary from couple to couple, but in general, cheating is usually considered an act or behavior that infringes on the agreed-upon boundaries of your relationship.

How betrayal can feel

Cheating can have many emotional effects on the person who has committed the unfaithful act, the person who feels they have been betrayed, and the couple together. Infidelity may result in broken or damaged trust. In a relationship, partners may trust one another, but when this trust is betrayed through something like cheating, it may not only shake the bedrock of the relationship itself but can also call other facets of a person's life into question. Cheating can have potentially far-reaching effects outside of just the relationship.

Cheating can bring about feelings of shame and inadequacy. Those who feel betrayed may turn inward and become very introspective as they try to work through why or how it happened. They may question if they are “enough” (for instance, “attractive enough” or “interesting enough”) and wonder why their partner connected deeply with someone other than them. While it can be understandable to experience these thoughts, the decision to cheat is made by the unfaithful partner, and not by the partner who was cheated on.

Quotes for strength and healing

Quotes may help you on your healing journey, as they can demonstrate that you are not alone in your experiences and there is a proverbial light at the end of the tunnel. When you read each quote, you might try taking some time to pause and reflect on them; what they mean, how they make you feel, and so on. You might even step away if the thought sparks a strong emotional reaction or consider writing down your thoughts and feelings about each one. What can be helpful to remember is that as painful as betrayal can be, pain and difficulty can have a silver lining – they can be incredible catalysts for growth and increased understanding of ourselves and the world we live in.

“Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny.”– C.S. Lewis

• A betrayal by a partner can be a hardship, but a struggle in the present can lead to strength that can help you make an amazing future.

"They didn't cheat because of who you are. They chose to cheat because of who they are not."- Charles J. Orlando

• This quote may help you understand that you did not cause the cheating. Your partner’s decision was theirs, not yours. You cannot control the actions or behaviors of anyone else, nor should you try to; but you can control your own. You can try to take care of yourself and to nurture yourself, especially when you’re in pain.

“No matter how dark the night may get, your light will never burn out.”– Jeanette LeBlanc

• This quote may remind you of the strengths you still possess even during tough times. When a partner cheats, it may feel as if your world has flipped upside down. Despite the darkness you may be enduring, you remain a bright light in the world because of your uniqueness.

“Sometimes you’ve just got to give yourself what you wish someone else would give you.”– Dr. Phil McGraw

• A partner who cheats may not be giving you what you wish for, but you can find ways to give those things to yourself. You can love yourself, respect yourself, and be true to yourself.

“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.”– Carl Bard

• If you find yourself questioning the relationship or having regrets about it, remember that you can’t change the past, but the future can be yours. You can move forward to positive times ahead.

“Cry. Forgive. Learn. Move on. Let your tears water the seeds of your future happiness.”–Steve Maraboli

• This quote can be inspiring because it addresses feelings in the present and hope for the future. If your partner cheated, allow yourself to feel all of your emotions; you might cry, question, grieve, feel the sadness, or take time to process your individual emotions. Then, you might try to forgive. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting the harm that occurred. It also doesn’t mean that you must reconcile with your partner who was unfaithful (although you might choose to). However, it can mean letting go of anger and resentment so that you can live a more positive life. Your sadness and tears can help you grow toward a healthier future.

“Sadness flies away on the wings of time.”–Jean de La Fontaine

• This quote is reminiscent of the proverbial saying, “Time heals all wounds.” When you’re feeling sad, you might take comfort in knowing that while it feels painful, sadness usually lessens with time. There is hope for the future—a future of happiness and fulfillment.

“Every time your heart is broken, a doorway cracks open to a world full of new beginnings, new opportunities.”–Patti Roberts

• Your heart may feel broken, but you can work through it and find new beginnings. If you and your partner decide to stay together, you may find ways to be in a healthier, more satisfying relationship. If you part ways, you can work on finding new opportunities that can lead to fulfillment and happiness for you in the future. This may or may not include a new romantic interest. 

“Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.”– Marilyn Monroe

• Marilyn Monroe’s quote can be one to remember when going through hard times because it provides a hopeful message. Good things may end, but better things may be about to begin.

"For what it’s worth: It’s never too late to be whoever you want to be. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you find you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start over again.”– F. Scott Fitzgerald

• Scott Fitzgerald’s quote is a reminder of second chances and new opportunities. You may or may not be living the life you’ve wanted, but you can muster the strength to find new beginnings and fresh opportunities to thrive.

“You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”– Marcus Aurelius

• This quote explains that though you didn’t have control over your partner cheating, you do have power over your mind. You may feel many emotions, but you also have strengths and can work your way through the feelings and begin to heal.

"With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts."–Eleanor Roosevelt

• If you find yourself having a particularly hard day, this quote may help. Each day you may grow a bit stronger and find new ways to get through hard times.

"Don't push your weaknesses, play with your strengths.”–Jennifer Lopez

• This quote can be particularly helpful when you’re looking for sources of strength within yourself. If a partner cheats, you may find that you begin questioning yourself or wondering if you did something “wrong.” Remember, the decision to be unfaithful was not yours; a weakness or shortcoming on your part did not “cause it.” While reflecting on your role in the relationship can be natural and even healthy, it can be important to remember your strengths and the positive things you contribute to the relationship.

Online counseling with Regain

When a partner cheats, you may find yourself feeling a range of emotions and facing a different future than you might have been envisioning—whether that future is with or without your partner. In either case, therapy can help. A relationship therapist can help you and your partner navigate next steps for your relationship (whether you stay together or break up). They can also work with you individually to offer professional support to recover from the cheating and find ways to productively move forward. Through Regain, you can connect with your therapist virtually from the comfort of your own home or from any place where you have a reliable internet connection. You deserve a healthy, happy relationship, and getting to that point may be just a click away. 

The efficacy of online counseling 

Infidelity can lead to a number of negative outcomes in a relationship. Online counseling has been shown to be a viable resource for addressing these issues. In one study, researchers found that couples therapy delivered via videoconferencing produced beneficial results. These results included a “positive shift in expectations” of one another, allowing for more satisfaction with the relationship. Couples reported feeling connected with the therapist and said that seeing them via video created an element of ‘distance’ which “allowed them to feel a greater sense of control and comfort.”

The takeaway

Whether you’ve decided to part ways with someone who cheated on you or you’re trying to make the relationship work, it can be challenging to do it alone. While quotes can be a source of comfort during difficult times, they are not a replacement for professional intervention. If you’ve been cheated on and are still dealing with the emotional effects of betrayal and broken trust, it may be time to confide in an online therapist. Regain can connect you with a licensed counselor to support you during this time and help you work toward a healthier, more satisfying romantic relationship.