How Common Is Cheating?
When you start dating someone, you and your partner develop a foundation for something beautiful. One of the most important parts of a romantic connection is trust. That means believing your partner will be faithful to you. You need to trust that your partner loves you and wants to be with you. When you think about it, that's a hard leap of faith to take. But it's what is necessary for a healthy relationship. Many of us choose to think positively and assume the best. We want to think our partners are loyal. Unfortunately, as much as we would like to believe that our partners are faithful, cheating is common in relationships. Many marriages end in divorce, and one of the most common causes of divorce is infidelity. This is unfortunate, but it's not surprising given the statistics. According to the Institute For Family Studies, 13% of women and 20% of men have cheated via sex while married. Apps aren't to blame for cheating; it takes personal responsibility to refrain from engaging in infidelity.
However, many people who cheat on their spouses may use apps to do so. Depending on the cheating your partner is engaging in, whether sexual, emotional or otherwise, there are different apps they might use to cheat or hide their behavior. Is your partner using apps to engage in an affair? If you think they might be cheating on you, here are some common apps that someone could use to engage in infidelity that you should be aware of and look out for on your partner's phone or tablet.
This is a messaging system and third-party application that's available on all major smartphones and devices. On the surface, it looks like a regular messaging app, but it has components that make it easy for people to communicate in secrecy and talk about private matters. For example, it has a hidden chat option, which means that if a partner were to look at your phone, they wouldn't know about the conversation. Secret conversations are integral to people involved in affairs. The secrecy of the communication adds to the appeal of the connection. When someone uses Viber, they can keep their communication confidential and tantalizing.
Telegram isn't only for having affairs. Many people use this app - not just people who are cheating. Telegram is another common chat app like Signal or WhatsApp. However, there are pieces of this app that can be used for infidelity. As with Viber, there's a hidden chat option. Also, there's a timed option for automatic destruction of correspondence.
A tracking app isn't something they'll use to cheat on you through chat or video; it is a tool they might utilize to get away with their affair without getting caught. If your partner has a GPS tracking app on their phone (which is not the same as a normal GPS app that helps you get to where you're going; it's a way to see where someone else is at all times), they might be using it to keep tabs on you. If you have a reason to suspect cheating, this is something to look into for sure.
If someone has a dating app on their phone and is in a committed partnership, it's a dead giveaway that they are unhappy in their current relationship. If you have an open relationship or your partner is using an app to make friends, and they've communicated with you about it, that's one thing. If they've never told you about the app and you happen to notice that they're occupied by an app that is for dating specifically, however, it's a likely cause for concern. Examples of dating apps include Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, Plenty of Fish, eHarmony, and Match. There are many dating apps out there, so this is by no means an extensive list.
Social media may seem like a harmless place to connect with old friends or make new online connections. However, it's a place that can be a breeding ground for infidelity. Whether it's having an emotional affair or it becomes a full-on physically intimate relationship, social media can be the catalyst for cheating. It brings forth the idea that if your partner is unfaithful, they might not necessarily use a special app for that purpose. For example, Instagram is a tool that can encourage outside affairs. It's a place where it's easy to talk to people in a private setting on your terms. Here's more:
Instagram is a popular app where people share videos and images. You can write long captions where you share about anything from how your day went to an excellent meal that you had at a restaurant. Almost everyone has an Instagram account these days, and nothing about having an Instagram account alludes to cheating. However, some people who cheat will use Instagram messaging to communicate privately with the person they see outside of their relationship. You can initiate conversations with people you don't know based on their physical appearance or what they share. You can delete messages after having the conversations. People might use Instagram, Facebook, or any other social media platform to do this as a way to talk to someone without their phone number showing up when they text or call.
Like Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook, Snapchat is a common app people use to connect with others. Many people use Snapchat for fun filters or to communicate with friends, so if your partner doesn't show any other signs of cheating, there's no need to be worried about them having Snapchat on their phone. That said, if a person is going to cheat, they might use Snapchat to their advantage. Snapchat leaves no trace of personal messages, videos, and photos after they're opened, making it easy for a cheater to avoid getting caught.
Other Ways That People Cheat
One way that people cheat is by having another phone line. If you have an extra phone line, you can get away with talking to a person on the side more easily. The bottom line is that there are so many ways for a person to hide what they're doing, and although technology is an incredible thing that has done so much good for the modern world, apps make it easier than ever to cheat without anyone finding out. If you suspect that your partner is having an affair using an app, here are some things that you can do:
Confrontation isn't easy for some people. It can be nerve-wracking to face the fact that your partner is unfaithful. When you suspect that someone is cheating and have evidence to back it up, it's wise to confront them about it as long as you feel safe in the situation. If your partner has been abusive in any way, including verbal, emotional, mental, physical, or sexual abuse, the critical thing to do is prioritize your wellbeing. If you don't feel safe talking about infidelity, don't risk your health. Talk to a licensed therapist if you're not sure how to handle the news that your partner has been unfaithful. A mental health professional can guide you through this process. If you are at risk of harm, reach out immediately to domestic violence services in your local area.
Go To Couples Therapy
You likely sense that your spouse is using an affair app to cheat on you if you're reading this. Whether or not that's the case, your feelings are likely symbolic of some relationship issues that need to be dealt with. Couples therapy is a safe place to talk with your partner about issues in your relationship with a licensed mental health professional present. It can save marriages, or it can help you split peacefully. If you're not ready to bring it up with your partner or you're afraid to do so, you might consider seeking the help of an individual counselor who can help you take a look at the situation and potentially prepare you to confront your partner or bring up the idea of couples counseling.
Why Are They Cheating? Getting Help
If you find that your partner is having an affair, it's crucial to understand that it's not your fault. You didn't cause them to stray outside of the relationship. Discovering that they've been unfaithful is devastating, often shocking, and something that no one deserves to experience. If you're the one who's cheating, the most critical question to ask yourself is: why are you stepping outside of your relationship to cheat? One of the most common reasons people cheat is that they're hesitant to end a long-term relationship. As a result, they engage in triangulation and bring another person into the relationship to cause the breakup. The behavior is due to fear of confrontation. If you're afraid to end a relationship, there is something that can help, and that's couples' therapy. Online therapy is an excellent place to work through issues related to relationships and infidelity. At ReGain, you can talk to an individual counselor or find a couples' counselor for you and your spouse to work with together. Every situation is unique, and a licensed mental health professional will help you look at things objectively so that you can find the best outcome for your situation.