Recognizing The Signs He Wants You To Be His Girlfriend
How do you know when a guy wants you to be his girlfriend? Many men show signs that may indicate they are ready for a relationship with you. Read on to learn more about recognizing when a man wants something more than casual and how working with a therapist can help you develop communication skills.
Where Is Your Relationship Going?
It’s natural to want to know where the relationship is going when you’ve been dating a guy—or if what you have would even qualify. Before you ask him outright and risk an awkward or disappointing conversation, look for signs that he wants to make you his girlfriend.
“Given the costs of failed relationships (e.g., personal distress, problems with work, lower well-being for children, lost opportunities to meet other partners), it is important to consider how individuals are approaching these decisions.” — Journal of Couple and Relationship Therapy
Signs He Wants You To Be His Girlfriend
If you’re wondering whether the guy you’ve been seeing wants to make it official, check out some of these tips to give you an idea of what he may be thinking about a potential relationship.
He Stays Close To You When You’re Together
When you’re together, if he stays physically close to you and frequently makes non-sexual physical contact, he may be interested in making your connection more official. At the beginning of a relationship, the brain releases the neurochemical oxytocin when close to the object of affection, which causes pleasant feelings and inspires an increased desire to be around them more. Oxytocin stimulates the brain’s reward system in men, sometimes increasing the reaction they experience and making them crave more.
Intimate Encounters Have Feeling Behind Them
Intimate contact can feel different when there are emotions behind the physical connection. From a simple kiss to sexual contact, if your encounters with him carry a more significant emotional weight lately, it could mean he’s feeling emotions that make him want to take the next step.
He Does Things For You “Just Because”
If the man you’ve been seeing frequently does things for you, such as bringing you coffee or helping you change a flat tire, “just because” he wanted to, it could indicate that he is interested in making you his girlfriend. It shows he’s thinking of you and wants to care for your well-being.
Public Displays Of Affection Like Hand Holding
Holding your hand in public means he is comfortable with everyone around you recognizing that you’re together, which could indicate he would like you to be his girlfriend and wants other men to know you're unavailable.
It Feels Like A Healthy Relationship
Sometimes, you can feel when a relationship is good for both partners. If you’ve been seeing a guy and it has gradually grown more serious as you both develop feelings and make adjustments to include each other in your lives, there’s a good chance he wants you to be his girlfriend.
He Makes Room For You At His Place
If the guy you’re seeing makes a space for you to store some of your things at his house because you’ve been staying there more often, it could mean he values having you in his home and wants you to feel comfortable—and wants you to be there more often.
He’s Told His Friends About You And Includes You When Socializing
One of the biggest indications that he wants to make you a more permanent fixture in his life is telling his friends about you and including you when he socializes with them. The opinions of his friends likely matter a great deal to him, and introducing you to his friends could mean he wants them to like you before he asks you to be his girlfriend.
“It’s common when you’re in a new relationship and really excited about someone you met to want to tell the world. But what happens when rather than proudly telling everyone on social media about your new date, your partner hides you?” — Psychologist Mary Jo Rapini, Fox 26 Houston
He’s Stopped Dating Other Women
If you met him online or on a dating site and noticed his profile is no longer active, he may have stopped dating other women. This behavior could indicate that he’s interested in officially making you his girlfriend.
He Uses The Word “We”
Studies show that when a man is invested in forming a relationship with a woman, he is more likely to use the word “we” to refer to the two of you more often than “you” or “I.” It could indicate that he thinks of you as a couple and shapes his thoughts and actions while considering how it affects you.
He Tells You About His Day
When something happens to him, if you're the first person he wants to talk to, it could indicate that you're on his mind, and he wants you to know how he’s doing. Making a point to communicate with you, even about the little things, could mean he wants you to be a bigger part of his life.
He Shares His Thoughts And Feelings
Many men have a hard time sharing their thoughts and feelings until they’ve formed enough of an emotional connection to feel safe trusting you. If you’ve been dating a guy who feels comfortable enough to share what he’s thinking and how he feels, he may be ready to make your relationship official.
He Doesn’t Hesitate To Apologize
If he doesn’t hesitate to apologize after you’ve had an argument or disagreement, he’s likely worried about your feelings and wants you to know that he cares whether the two of you are on good terms.
He Makes You A Priority
A man who shifts things around to make you a priority in his life is likely one who is interested in making you an official part of it. When a guy wants to make you his girlfriend, he will likely choose to spend time with you over other options.
He Dedicates A Substantial Portion Of His Time To You
If you see and talk to him every day, he is likely manipulating his schedule to make it happen because he wants you in his life. When a man puts spending time with you at the top of his to-do list, he probably wants you to be his girlfriend.
He Wants To Introduce You To His Family
Men talking about their parents’ happy marriage may feel comfortable letting you know they are considering a long-term relationship. When a man wants to introduce you to his family, there’s a good chance he’s ready to take the next step and make the relationship official. Meeting his parents and other family members is generally considered a big step in the dating process, so it’s a good indicator that he is ready to make a commitment.
Signs He’s Not Interested In A Relationship
- The connection between you feels exhausting rather than energizing.
- You’re always the one who has to apologize.
- You lack a real, meaningful emotional connection or intimacy.
- He never sacrifices anything important to him for your sake.
- He doesn't answer your messages promptly or only gives short answers.
- You don’t see or speak to each other very often.
- You’re always the one reaching out to him.
Reach Out For Support
If you’re having trouble assessing whether a guy wants a relationship with you, you may need to develop your communication skills. You could benefit from the support and guidance of a mental health professional.
How Therapy Can Help Recognize And Communicate Your Needs
If you struggle to connect with men and accurately judge when he wants a relationship, consider working with a licensed therapist online through a relationship-focused virtual therapy platform like Regain. Parents or guardians seeking online therapy for kids from 12 to 19 can contact TeenCounseling. Therapy can help develop communication skills, recognize and communicate emotional needs, and find practical coping skills to help you manage stress, making finding a healthy relationship easier.
Researchers at the American Psychological Association released data showing that online and face-to-face therapy offer similar results. Patients frequently listed the benefits of online therapy as including lower costs and shorter wait times, along with an easier time sharing personal information with the therapist while physically separated and the ability to participate more reliably due to the convenience of attending from home.
You can set better expectations for developing relationships when you have an idea of how he feels about you. Beyond asking him, which can lead to an awkward conversation, it can help to recognize the signs he wants to make you his girlfriend. The information in this article may offer insight into when a guy is ready to make the relationship official and how therapy can teach you practical communication skills.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
How Do You Tell If a Guy Wants to Make You His Girlfriend?
If you meet a guy and start to spend time with him, he might begin to show clear signs that he thinks you’re special and wants a long term relationship. He might start to sweet talk you and introduce you to his group of friends and family; any of the important people in his life. He may also start to call or text you often, and try to make a good impression.
When Should He Ask You to Be His Girlfriend?
If you have a mutual interest in one another and start seeing each other often, that would be the ideal time for him to ask you to be his girlfriend.
If you met on social media or dating apps, once you start meeting face to face and find that you have chemistry, he’ll be open to the idea of starting a committed relationship with you.
How Do You Tell If a Guy Wants a Relationship or Just a Hookup?
You can usually tell that a guy wants just a hook when he tries manipulations to put on a good show for you. A man who doesn’t want a love life with you might try to butter you up, but he won’t stand by your side if there is a problem you are dealing with and need help. He also typically won’t show you his vulnerable side because he doesn’t plan on being around you for long.
Does He Want You to Be His Girlfriend?
A guy who wants you to be his girlfriend typically won’t play mind games with you. He won’t see you one day and then not call you for a few weeks.
If a guy likes you and is trying to make a good impression, he will want to be with you all the time.
How Do You Know if a Man is Serious About You?
A man who is serious about you and considering having a love life with you will want you to know the people in his life, his friends and family, and won’t play juvenile games. He will show signs he sees you as his future wife.
If he’s mature mind games missing from the time you spend with him will be evident.
A man who is serious about you will want to connect on a deeper level. He may say that he “love love loves you” or a silly thing like that to show then he really cares about you.
How Do You Make Him Miss You Like Crazy?
When a guy likes you, he might tell his friends and family that he misses you like crazy when you aren’t together. Even short times apart my feel like weeks to a stir-crazy boy in love.
If you want to make him miss you, then don’t give in to his desire to see you all the time. However, if you really cared for him in a loving way, why would you want to make him miss you? You would be missing him too.
How Long Do Guys Wait to Make it Official?
Depending on the guy and how he feels about you, he might want to start a love life with you right away. Some men won’t play games, and they cut to the chase; they want you in their life. They will introduce you to friends and family right away and make It clear how he feels about you.
These types of guys don’t get life horoscope advice; they want to really live. Unlike life horoscope advice, there are no mind games included. They want to be with you and will do whatever it takes to win your heart.
Does He Want to Commit?
Unlike life horoscope columns, people who want a love life will show you that they want a commitment. When you are walking down the street, he will want to hold your hand; he’s not ashamed to be with you. When you are with friends, he will act appropriately and not do foolish things that make you or your friends questions his dedication to you.
However, if you are still not sure where he stands, just ask. What is the worse thing he can say? If it’s no, I like you, but I don’t want a relationship, then you know that a friendship is all you will ever have with him. Just be careful that he doesn’t play mind games and cause emotional abuse; no girl should ever be subjected to that type of behavior.
How long does it take for a man to make you his girlfriend?
How do you make him crave for you?
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