Is She Interested In Me Or Just Being Friendly: 10 Ways To Tell

Updated March 19, 2024by Regain Editorial Team

One of the most difficult aspects of being single is overcoming the challenges that dating brings, including approaching someone to see if they are interested in you. How often do you find yourself attracted to a person but not sure how they feel about you? It happens more often than you may think. Imagine the stressors associated with that feeling of not knowing. You begin to question yourself about the approach. Imagine a more difficult scenario. What if the person is extremely friendly towards you, but you are unable to determine if this friendliness is an indicator of something more? Yikes! That happens often and can be intimidating as well as overwhelming. If you are curious if there are ways to tell the difference between a friendly relationship and someone who may actually like you, read on. Knowing the subtle (and not so subtle) signs that a woman is interested in you.

Not sure if she is interested in you?

The friendzone

There are various ways to approach a person to ask them out or pursue a more serious relationship. What is the strategy when the person is always friendly towards you or a friend? In one word, awkward. Yes, it can be awkward, but it does not have to be that way. There is a process to the approach when you are completely unsure if a person is interested in you or just being friendly. It begins by understanding the downside of pursuing someone who is not interested in you.

The friendly person

Some people are friendly by nature. They are always smiling, offering kind words, greeting you with a hug or friendly touch, or other similar gestures. These gestures of friendliness often lead people to believe that the person is interested in them. Unfortunately, that is not always the case. In any event, pursuing or approaching someone who is simply friendly by nature and has no romantic interest in you at all can backfire when she just wants to be friends all this time. It can create periods of awkwardness that are sometimes difficult or impossible to recover the comfort level in your friendship.

Here are a few ways that pursuing someone who is just being friendly can have a negative impact on your friendship.

  • The "friendly person" may feel insulted that you misread their friendliness for something more
  • The "friendly person" may choose to remove themselves from your life completely
  • You could ruin the potential for a quality friendship
  • The "friendly person" may begin to act differently or strangely in your presence

Distinguish between the two

If you are almost certain that the person may be interested in being more than just friends but want to be sure so your friendship remains solid, there are ways to distinguish between the two. For instance, you may have noticed that she like acts differently around you than when she is around other people. There are a few other factors that will help you determine if she is romantically interested in you or simply being friendly. 


How to tell if she's interested? Here are a few ways to tell if a person likes you, which would allow you to make a conscious decision on whether to pursue them:

  1. Engage eye contact

If you glance at them and consistently notice that they initiate an extended "glance back" it is likely that they are interested in you (or you have something in your teeth). Eye contact is not always easy to maintain for some people. It makes them uncomfortable or anxious. However, if a person is interested in you and shyly glances at you while you are looking at them, they may like you.

If you are managing anxiety or low self-esteem, you may not be able to engage eye contact with anyone, and you may find it difficult to believe that anyone likes you for more than just a friend. Just remember that when a person returns the same sentiment of eye contact as you feel, this can be a strong indicator that they are interested in you.

Exercise caution with eye contact. You do not want to stare anyone down and cause alarm.

  1. Spontaneous touches

Sitting close to each other or walking by one another in a crowded space, you may begin to encounter spontaneous touches. You might notice that they casually touch your arm, shoulder, or hand during conversations. If a person makes the conscious effort to engage in contact with you, even casually, they may be flirting or attempting to get you to notice that they are interested in being more than just friends.

  1. The reflective character

When talking to this person, if you notice that they have many of the same movements or make the same gestures as you, it could be a sign. When a connection is made between two people, it is typical that they subconsciously begin to mimic each other. They may start to stand and sit alike or execute the same dramatics in conversation. Mirroring the acts of another person is a sign of interest. However, it could simply be admiration or desire to improve themselves in some way, and not necessarily a romantic interest.

  1. They want to know more about you

They have long engaging thoughts about you and have a strong desire to learn as much about you as possible. A person that wants to know your likes, dislikes, hobbies, fears, and deepest thoughts are interested in connecting with you emotionally. They are intuitive and ask questions about your day and your life, personal questions. They strive to keep the conversation going, and you may find that you spend hours talking while giving no attention to the time.

Getty/Vadym Pastukh
Not sure if she is interested in you?
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