What Is A Family Of Origin? Definition, Perspectives, And Importance
Much is said about how childhood trauma and triumphs can influence your health, relationships, and self-esteem in adulthood. However, childhood is far more than just your experiences. For example, your family of origin influences the factors determining whether your childhood was healthy or unhealthy. So what exactly does this term mean, and why is it important?
Family Of Origin: A Definition
Although, at first glance, your origin might mean your biological family, there is more that goes into this origin than your biological parents or siblings. Instead, the term "family of origin" covers a broader scope and includes the family in which you grew up—adopted or biological—for the majority of your formative years. For example, if your grandparents are your legal guardians and were from the time you were a toddler, your grandparents would be considered part of your origin. If you were adopted into a family from another country as a child and relocated to live with them, your adopted family would qualify under this term. Rather than a biological definition, this term seeks to identify the people closest to you as you grew and developed.
Why Is Family Of Origin Important?
This origin is important because it plays a significant role in the way you are raised. Your origin usually has certain religious, philosophical, and moral beliefs, and it is through these lenses, you are brought up, disciplined, encouraged, and even defined. How you are raised can extend past numerous generations or may only cover one or two generations.
Identifying and evaluating your origin can lend a lot of insight into your habits, belief systems, and how you think about or look at yourself and influence your worldview, relationships, and mental health. In addition, your origin related to your family is far more than a simple throwback to your childhood; it forms the basis for how you function as an adult and how you choose to live.
Family Of Origin And Worldview
This origin shapes worldview primarily through the way you are raised. Children are more likely to agree with their parents, siblings, and others close to them, as the examples set by these individuals are the most formative examples offered to a child. In effect, children will turn to the authority figures and loved ones closest to them to form opinions and ideas about the world around them. These are the examples they often carry into adulthood.
This does not mean that all children will take on the exact belief systems of their parents. As some studies can attest, plenty of children abandon their parent's and grandparents' religious, political, and philosophical ideologies. This does mean, though, that their worldview is likely to be colored (at least partially) by the same lens as their parents and grandparents, even if the exact result or opinion is not quite the same. Someone who grew up in a politically left-leaning, evangelical family, for instance, might not espouse the same religious beliefs or same political stance but is more likely to believe in some form of religion or spirituality and progressive politics than someone who grew up in a right-leaning, agnostic home.
Even if the precise leanings of your family do not persist into adulthood, your family's worldview still impacts your beliefs. You might not believe the same way as your familial origin, but you may feel guilt, embarrassment, or shame for believing differently. In this way, this origin has a significant role in formulating your ideas, views, and opinions.
Family Of Origin And Relationships
Your family of origin also influences how you interact with others and develop or instigate relationships. The way your parents (or grandparents, or other parental figures) treat each other and you are pivotal in helping you develop your ideas regarding relationships, marriage, partnership, and family. If your parental figures are callous or cold toward one another, for instance, you are far more likely to seek out similar relationships or feel that this form of treatment is acceptable. If your parents had a loving, rich relationship, you are likely to seek out similar dynamics. If you only had one parent or parental figure, you might feel uncomfortable or uncertain in relationships, not having had a model for how relationships usually look.
The different facets of relationships are also powerfully influenced by your origin as it relates to your family. Attachment, communication, trust, and are all implicated in how you observed these things as a child. Parents with poor communication skills (whether among themselves, toward you and any siblings you might have had, or both) raise children with poor communication skills, and so forth. Although many of these issues can be remediated, this is done through conscious, intentional unlearning of habits and tendencies and does not usually happen as an organic growth pattern.
Family Of Origin And Mental Health
Mental health is also influenced by this origin, though these associations can be more difficult to define. Because many mental health conditions and disorders involve genetic components, there may be compounding issues in play where mental health is concerned. Although many studies indicate that most mental health issues have some form of a genetic component, these genetic components could be exacerbated by the profound influence of this origin. Parents who have been diagnosed with a depressive disorder, for instance, are more likely to have children with depressive disorders, perhaps in part due to genetic factors but also in part due to learned behaviors and coping mechanisms. This can also be true of addiction and dependence disorders; however, children whose parents struggle with substance abuse may be more genetically inclined to addiction; they may also witness their parents turning to substance abuse in times of stress (or celebration) and use that as their standard.
Does Family Of Origin Ever Not Have Influence?
Although many situations would benefit from children not being influenced by their families of origin, such as cases of abuse or neglect, research consistently demonstrates the robust and profound effect that this has on children's development, behaviors, and ideas, extending from youth to adulthood.
Fortunately, if unhealthy dynamics are a part of your origin, this does not mean that you must follow in those footsteps. Instead, you can unlearn and reframe unhealthy thought patterns, behaviors, and ideas to create a life that is more in line with health, confidence, and strength. This is most commonly accomplished through therapy with a qualified mental health professional. These individuals can help identify any maladaptive coping mechanisms, symptoms of illness, or unhealthy habits you may possess and can more effectively map out and implement treatment plans. Therapists may be available for in-office hours or may be found online through sites such as Regain.us. Through online therapy, you are able to receive a level of support comparable to in-person therapy, typically with greater affordability, convenience, and privacy.
How Significant Is Your Family Of Origin?
Most relevant research highlights one important focus, that this origin is immensely important in the lives of children and adults. Although many people see their childhood as something left behind after reaching adulthood, the joys, pains, traumas, and triumphs of childhood have a very real and lasting impact on how you behave, interact with others, and believe an adult. This origin is not a simple matter, then, but is part of a complex and ever-moving framework that shapes who you are and how you move in the world.
Your origin as it relates to your family can be a wonderful source of encouragement and support. Still, it can also provide some of the most trying experiences you will ever encounter. Even something as seemingly benign as the way your father speaks to your mother can have a profound influence on how you see yourself, speak to others, and cultivate relationships, and the effects of your growth and patterning in childhood should never be discounted in adulthood.
Although the far-reaching nature of families of origin can be troubling, there is good news: even though families of origin can cause lasting damage and perpetuate a lot of pain, many of the negative aspects of your origin can be mitigated through therapy by essentially unlearning unhealthy habits, and replacing them with healthier, more compassionate ones. Rewiring can be done in an individual therapy setting, where you explore your relationships, childhood, and behaviors on your own, or can be tackled in family therapy, where the focus is placed on your family as a unit, rather than placing all of the work on your shoulders.
In either case, though, the potential wounds inflicted by your origin as it relates to your family can be healed, and you can create stronger, healthier dynamics for your children to participate in and grow up around, to create a far healthier family legacy.
By understanding your family of origin, you can understand the foundation to many of the traits you exhibit in daily life. Then, you can begin unlearning negative habits while healing from mental and emotional wounds related to your upbringing.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
What Does A Family Of Origin Mean?
A person’s family of origin is a huge part of their identity. A person’s origin family goes a long way in determining the trajectory of their life. A family of origin can be defined as the family a person grew up in. This could mean biological family or adoptive family. However, your origin family must be the people you lived with during your formative years. Even if the people you grew up with are in your extended family. As long as they were your legal guardians during your formative years, they are your family of origin. Your family of origin is the people who were closest to you while you were growing up.
Though a person’s biological family is an important part of their identity, their biological family won’t count as their family of origin if they didn't grow up with their biological family. Children get their sense of identity from their family environment. The people around them during their formative years have a huge influence on them. This is because children pick up behavioral and cognitive patterns from the people they grow up with. Adults who grew up in a healthy family tend to be more successful and happy than those who grew up in an unhealthy family. Studies show that a person’s family of origin also influences whether they have a healthy or unhealthy family of their own in the future. The healthier the family of origin, the better the chances are of being successful.
A person’s family environment often determines their religion, morals, philosophies, and values. If you take time and analyze your family origin's influence on your identity, it becomes apparent that family environment is a bigger determinant of identity than biology. If you feel like your family of origin hurts your identity, you can seek family therapy as a solution.
What Is Your Role In Your Family Of Origin?
When you were a child, your parents played the role of provider and teacher. As an adult, you may wonder what your role is in your family of origin. Your family role shapes your family dynamics. Studies show that healthy families are strong because their members are willing to depend on and help each other. As an adult, your ability to help your family members increases, and you are expected to take a more active role in the family. By taking on a family role, you can help create a healthy family of origin. There are different approaches you can take to determine your role in your family of origin. The approaches are:
The Social Approach: It is said that the family unit is at the center of any society. This is because the family unit is the first and most important social institution we are a part of. There are various social roles you can play in your family. For example, you could plan events and gatherings that will bring your family closer together. If you are good at conflict resolution, you could be the family mediator. Mediators are important for maintaining healthy families, and the healthier the family, the better its members are. They solve family issues like disputes.
You can show up and provide support for your family members on important dates and events. It is expected in a healthy family environment that members show up for important occasions such as birthdays, weddings, births, etc. By taking an active social role in your family, you will help keep your family bonds strong. Members of a family of origin work together to create a social support system within the family.
The Emotional Approach: Healthy families are a haven for their members. Members of healthy families support each other emotionally. As an adult in your family, you should be there for your family members in times of great joy or sorrow. The tragedy is inevitable, but having a family to support you in times of tragedy can make most bad times bearable. You can look for ways to be more emotionally available for your family members and help solve family issues. This will help you make a healthy family of origin. Members of a family of origin work together to create an emotional support system.
Financially: You are not required to help your family members financially if you cannot do so. As an adult, there will be times when you might need to provide financial help for family members. Sometimes, members of a family of origin work together to create a stable financial support system.
Members taking active roles in the family is important for a healthy family environment. However, it is important only to adopt roles you are capable of carrying out.
What Is The Meaning Of Origin?
The origin of a person or thing is the place, circumstances, or events that led to their present state. The place that something arises or is derived from is its origin.
The use of origin in the phrase ‘family of origin’ is a little different. According to the definition of a family of origin, family isn’t limited to biological family. Family can be biological, blended, adoptive, or found family. So, the family in this context is both referring to people and a situation.
The people are the individuals you would consider family (people who identify as such)
The situation is that those were the people closest to you during your formative years, the people you grew up with
So, a person’s family of origin is any group of people who identify as their family and were present during their formative years. So, in a real sense, a family environment is a place that a person is ‘derived’ from. Understanding this is the first step in solving family of origin issues.
What Do You Call The Family You Grew Up With?
The family that you grow up with is referred to as your family of origin. These are the group of people present during your formative years and identify as your family members. This is not limited to people you are related to by blood; your biological family might not be your family of origin. For instance, if you grew up with your uncle and his family, they are your family of origin. If you are not sure due to spending chunks of your formative years with different people, determining who had the most influence over you can help you solve a family of origin issue.
You might have a biological family that you didn’t grow up with. This could be because you attended a school far from your home and had to live at your Uncle’s place because it was closer. Whatever the family dynamics are, if you grow up with people who identify as your family and were there through your formative years, those people are your family of origin. This is a simple way to solve a family of origin issues.
What Is A Family Motto?
A family motto is a phrase that captures the essence and values of your family. It doesn’t have to rhyme, neither does it have to be a mission statement. It can simply hold one belief that is central to your family’s values or family dynamics. It could even be a catchphrase or a meaningful line from a family story. A family motto is a phrase that holds important meaning to a family. A motto is important for a healthy family of origin.
What Are Examples Of Family Origin?
What Is Family Of Origin Theory?
What Are Family Of Origin Issues?
What Is Family Of Origin In Family Therapy?
What Is The Opposite Of Family Of Origin?
What Is The Origin And Purpose Of The Family?
What Are Different Family Types?
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