12 Signs A Man Is Attracted To You Sexually

Updated November 22, 2021

Medically Reviewed By: Lauren Guilbeault

If there’s a certain guy you feel you have a connection with, you probably want to know if the feeling is mutual. Luckily, it’s not hard to read how he feels about you once you know what to look for. Even if he’s the mysterious type who has perfected his poker face, subconscious tells will still give him away; he can’t control it! Signs a man is attracted to you sexually are universal and hardwired into men’s biological code. Knowing the surprising signs a man is attracted to you allows you to gain confidence and insight.

The Importance of Mutual Attraction

Nature has made us attractive to one another because it’s essential for the continuation of the species. You may like someone as a person but if you don’t experience a mutual level of romantic attraction, there won’t be much hope for the connection. It’s important that both people feel this mutual level of romantic attraction. This doesn’t mean that you have to instantly feel fireworks go off when you meet a guy, but you should be open to the possibility of getting to know him better.

We’ve all had experiences where someone is attracted to us, but we don’t reciprocate the feeling. This can lead to uncomfortable situations, especially if they continue to pursue us. Mutual attraction is important because it sets the stage for a successful relationship.

On the other hand, most of us have had the disheartening experience of being turned down by someone we were attracted to. You might have even had the experience where you’re making all the moves but the other person isn’t reciprocating or giving you a clear sign. That’s why it’s good to have a clear idea of what to look for when you’re trying to determine if the guy you’re interested in has the same feelings. It’s important to know whether or not he finds you attractive, because the street goes both ways!

If you feel like it’s difficult to get a handle on how a guy feels about you, it may help you to know that research has shown that men may have a harder time than women differentiating surprising signs of attraction. So, even if you know whether or not he finds you attractive, he might not be as perceptive to the subtle signs that you can’t stop thinking of him. Brain scans have shown that different parts of women’s brains activate when they are evaluating the behavior of potential mates, which may make them naturally more intuitive.

12 Signs a Man is Sexually Attracted to You

Knowing the common surprising signs a man displays when he’s attracted to you takes the guesswork out of the situation. You won’t have to constantly agonize over whether or not he’s into you and you can decide whether you want to be the first one to make a move with confidence.

While just one of these surprising signs may not mean he’s necessarily interested in you, displaying multiple signals on this list is a good indicator of what is going on in his mind. These indicators are a great way to know whether or not a man finds you attractive.

He Casually Makes Physical Contact

We’re not talking about anything overtly sexual. He may briefly place his hand on your shoulder or the crook of your elbow. Or he may brush against you, seemingly by accident. While some men are just more physically forward, if these “accidental” touches happen frequently, you can be sure he’s doing it on purpose. Or, when a man finds little excuses to casually make physical contact, that’s a good sign he’s attracted to you. This is one of the most obvious surprising signs he is attracted to you.

He’s Always Looking Deeply into Your Eyes

If a man is sexually attracted to you, he’ll probably frequently try to catch your gaze and hold it for an extended period. This type of eye contact radiates confidence and interest in the other person. While he may just be the friendly type, you can usually tell by the intensity of his stare how he feels. If he’s often making prolonged eye contact, that’s a good sign he’s attracted to you.

His eyes can also express his feelings in different ways. He may raise his eyebrow playfully when you two are chatting. Or you may spot him staring at you from across the room and smile when you catch him. If he’s talking to a group of people but makes the most eye contact with you, that’s a big sign he’s focused on you and that he finds you attractive.

On the other hand, if the guy you’re interested in happens to be the shy type, you may notice a distinct lack of eye contact. He may break eye contact repeatedly, looking down self-consciously. Or he may glance at you when he thinks you’re not looking, then quickly turn away.

He Starts to Take Extra Care of His Appearance

If a man is sexually attracted to you, he’ll want to present his best self so you’ll be more inclined to reciprocate. When a man takes care of his grooming, he’s showing you that he can be reliable and presentable. Depending on the settings in which you interact, you may notice he begins taking more effort to style his hair, wear cologne, and put on his most flattering clothes.

You may also notice him straightening his shirt, running his hand through his hair, or making other adjustments-all surprising signs that he’s trying to look his best around you. These are common grooming behaviors that are rooted in primal structures of the brain and mirror similar actions in the animal kingdom. If a man finds you attractive, you may catch him exhibiting these grooming behaviors while he’s talking or interacting with you, specifically.

He Flirts With You Any Chance He Gets

Some people are just naturally flirtatious-it’s a part of their personality. But if a guy is flirtatious toward you specifically, it’s usually a sign that he’s attracted to you. Flirtatious banter is a good way to foster mutual attraction and build up sexual tension between two people. It’s one of the most enjoyable and surprising signs a guy is attracted to you.

His Voice Deepens When He’s Talk to You

This can be a subtle change but you might pick up on it when you pay attention to how he speaks to his friends and other people around you. If his voice seems to deepen when he’s talking it’s a sign of a subconscious shift in order to appear more dominant and powerful. Research has suggested that women prefer deeper male voices to higher voices and men will often lower the tone of their voice without realizing it. This is one of those things that men don’t really do consciously, so they can’t hide that they’re attracted to you.

You Catch Him Staring…Not At Your Face

He might go to lengths to be discreet about it, but no matter how sly he is, you’ll probably at some point catch a guy who is attracted to you checking out your body. If a guy finds you attractive, he’ll often let his eyes wander; you might be catching him daydreaming as he stops thinking and just stares. Sometimes a guy might make it more obvious that he’s scoping out your body to let you know that he’s interested. Research has suggested that men are more easily turned on by visual stimulus than women, so if he finds you attractive and he can’t stop thinking about physical contact with your body, he’ll let his roving eyes do the talking.

He Tries to Appear Taller

One subconscious, deeply ingrained sign that a man is attracted to you is if he tries to make himself appear bigger and taller by stiffening his shoulders and straightening his spine. When a man is attracted to a woman, he may also adopt a so-called “power pose,” by putting his hands on his hips and pushing up his chest.

He Seems to be Nervous, Even If He’s Usually Calm

Have you ever gotten that “butterflies” feeling in your stomach when you’re attracted to someone? Maybe you find yourself distracted or struggling to find the right words? You might find yourself thinking, “I’m talking, but he doesn’t seem to be listening to me.” If a man is very physically attracted to you, it can be intimidating, and he may experience the same internal anxiety. This can be one of the most obvious surprising signs a shy man is attracted to you.

Even a confident man can find that his nerves get the better of him in this situation, especially if they’re attracted to you secretly. If he finds you very attractive, it can leave him flustered. He may stutter, not seem to know what to do with his hands, or fumble with whatever he’s holding on to.

He Shows Off When He Gets the Chance

If a man is very attracted to you, he may have the tendency to try to show off in front of you. This is especially true if he senses he’s got competition. If they’re attracted to you, they might even set up a competitive situation that they know that they’ll win, just to impress you. This is one of several surprising signs a coworker is attracted to you.

He’s Always Getting Close to You

When you’re having a conversation together, whether you’re standing around or sitting, you may notice him subtly leaning his body toward you, pointing his feet in your direction, or mimicking your gestures. These are all surprising signs that he’s highly attuned to what you’re doing at the moment. A man who is interested in you will attempt to be in close proximity to you whenever possible.

You Put a Smile on His Face

Whether he’s laughing at all your jokes or just seems to always crack a grin in your presence, it’s an indicator that he truly enjoys your company. If he finds you attractive, a man finds smiling and positivity to be very attractive, as do women, and they are especially attracted to someone who laughs at their jokes.

12. He Finds Any Excuse to Keep the Conversation Going

Whether in person or via messages, if he makes an effort to keep you talking it’s a sign that he wants to get close to you. He might engage you in talking about any subject he can think of, just to keep the connection going. He may ask you lots of questions, not only to determine if you’re already taken, but to prolong the conversation for as long as possible.

Keep in mind that just because a man is attracted to you sexually, it doesn’t mean that he’s interested in dating or pursuing a relationship. If you’re on the same page, then there’s no problem. If not, however, it’s important to be realistic about your expectations and clear about what you’re looking for to prevent heartbreak.

Experiencing Dating Difficulties?

Dating can be stressful and that stress can lead to negative thinking patterns, an aversion to dating, and even lowered self-esteem over time. If they go unchecked, these issues can become deeply rooted in our relationships and the ways we interact with each other.

Often, when our relationships follow unhealthy patterns, it can be hard to see the source of the problem. An experienced therapist can assist you in identifying the attitudes, thoughts, and behaviors that may be holding you back from experiencing a healthy, happy relationship and replacing them with more effective alternatives. ReGain.us is here for you to help you develop the tools necessary to have better relationships.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

How do you know when a guy is turned on by you?

There are some obvious surprising signs a man is turned on by you, but there are also some surprising signs that are more subtle. Body language tends to give a lot away when it comes to signals that he likes you or that a man is turned on by you. Some surprising signs are subtle, but they could very well mean that a man is turned on. An obvious sign that a guy’s turned on by you would be that he makes a move on you and either implies or outwardly says that a man is turned on or asks if you want to take things further. He might also get more touchy-feely, or you feel a slight increase in his body heat. While this is a subtle sign, it’s a sign to take note of.

How do you know if a guy is turned on while kissing?

A couple of surprising signs to look for can tell you if a guy is turned on while kissing. Surprising signs he’s turned on could include:

He’s using his hands to touch your neck, back, leg, or other areas while you kiss
You feel increasing sexual tension or sexual chemistry
His breathing gets heavier, even if only slightly

How do you know if someone is thinking about you sexually?

It’s hard to tell if someone’s thinking about you sexually. Again, you can’t read anyone’s mind; not even a relationship expert will get it right all of the time, which is why communication is so essential. However, there are some real surprising signs you can look for if you want to know whether or not a guy finds you attractive. First, if you feel sexual chemistry, it’s likely that it’s reciprocal.

If he stays really close to you, even when there is not a crowd around, that is a sign that the guy is attracted to you sexually. If he sits with his legs closed, he may be trying to conceal his sexual attraction and arousal. If he sits with his legs spread, however, he may be wanting to pull you into him. The two may seem the same and can be confusing. A lot of how the conversation is going will dictate whether he is sexually attracted to you or just intrigued. On the flip side, he may also be feeling true love. When men love a woman, they cannot stop thinking about you and are probably attracted to you sexually, as well. While there are obvious signs of sexual attraction, such as putting his arm around you, whispering in your ear, or suggesting you go back to his place, there are less obvious signs a man wants to make love to you too.

What does it mean if a guy moans while making out?

If a guy moans while you’re making out with each other, it’s a pretty reliable sign that a man is turned on. Signs you’re turning him all with be more obvious If you know a man well. You might start to notice certain patterns of obvious signs or surprising signs you’re making him turned on or that he’s turned on. Over time, you pick up on commonalities for signs you’re turning your man on. For example, signs you’re turning him on could be your man’s posture if he’s subconsciously opening his legs to you, breathing patterns, or voice often change when he’s turned on.

How do I know if a guy likes me?

If a guy likes you, or if he finds you attractive in any way, he might use certain behaviors and gestures to show it. Here are some surprising signs he’s into you:

He wants to hang out one on one (instead of with a group)
He can’t stop smiling when he’s with you
He’s constantly texting you first or looking for an excuse to start a conversation
He holds prolonged eye contact with you or gazes into your eyes for longer than a friend typically would
He gets jealous of any of your other potential love interests

Additionally, if he reaches out to put your hair behind your ear or makes other sweet gestures, it’s a great sign. Surprising signs that he’s interested also depend on context. A guy at work who’s interested will probably have to keep his feelings on the down-low, whereas a guy who’s not a coworker will have the ability to be more overt.

What do guys like most when making out?

Everyone, including men and women, like different things while making out. That said, there are some commonalities or things that many guys are known to enjoy while making out. If you’re wondering what to do while making out with a guy to make the experience even better for him, here are some things you can do that many guys love:

Make a light touch to the back of his neck
A gentle touch to his face
Put your hand on his chest or brush his collar bone

Also let the guy know what you like! Guys love this because it affirms what you want. Guys love feeling wanted and knowing that what they’re doing is something that you enjoy.

How do you tell if a guy is messing with you?

If you have been talking for a long time and have been out on many dates or seem to have developed some sort of relationship and he shows that he’s interested behind closed doors, but refuses to define the relationship regardless of how long it’s been, that is one of the surprising signs your guy is messing with you.

If you’re looking for surprising signs a guy likes you and wants to be with you in a serious or committed romantic relationship, this is one of the biggest surprising signs that he’s not ready in some way or another. Mental health professionals, including those available at ReGain, can help provide insight during challenging situations like these.

What makes a guy sexually attracted to you?

When a man is sexually attracted to you he may:

He may find attractive some qualities about you
Receive a lot of sexual energy from you
Find a sexual and emotional connection between you and him

Men and women are often sexually attracted and have a sexual desire to another due to pheromones that a person gives off. No one can control their pheromones as there are chemicals that act like hormones that are naturally given off.

How do you tell if a man is sexually attracted to you?

When a man is sexually attracted to you or shows sexual desire towards you, they may ask you to go out on a date or attempt to engage in a long term relationship with you. When a man is sexually attracted to you, they tend to have a lot of sexual energy and want to have sexual contact with you.

When a guy isn’t attracted to you, he will not spend much time with you. When a guy feels like he’s turned on or when a man is turned on he may be completely transparent.

How do you know if a guy is noticing you?

If a guy notices you, he will exhibit signs he likes you. Occasionally he may give off signs he doesn’t like you as he is nervous or does not know how to approach you. However, when a guy is nervous and is interested in talking to you, he will eventually let you know it. If he keeps you talking it’s a sign he notices you and if he keeps finding reasons to keep you talking it’s a sign he likes spending time with you.

Body language signs are undeniable signs that someone is noticing you. Pay attention to body language signs that show interest as these can be key to finding someone you’ve met who is falling in love with you.

Here are a couple of signs that a guy is noticing you:

He makes continuous eye contact
He winks at you or stares flirtatiously
He licks his lips when he looks at you

There are also times when your friends are the ones to pick up on the signs that he’s noticing you, signs that he likes you, or even signs that he’s thinking of you sexually.

How do you know if a guy likes you sexually?

When a guy is attracted to you sexually, they will show a strong sign of interest. A guy who likes you will talk to you, bring you gifts, or ask you on a date. A guy who likes you will also take an amount of time to make an effort to look good for you.

Dating a guy who likes you and is attracted to you sexually can be fun and exciting. If you are in an exclusive relationship with someone who is attracted to you sexually, your intimate time together should be exhilarating.

Here are some potential signs that a guy is thinking about you sexually or is sexually attracted to you:

You notice that he spread his legs while sitting and talking to you
He makes preening gestures when he’s around you
He brushes your arm or engages in other forms of physical contact

There are a lot of other body language cues, verbal cues, and nonverbal cues that can be signs he likes you, many of which are prevalent in a variety of sources of dating advice or relationship advice. If a guy is interested in a woman, he might talk a lot. Some of these double as signs of both romantic love and sexual energy, sexual interest, or signs of sexual tension. For example, if a guy smiles at you or makes flirty stares, it could be a sign of romantic love, but it could also mean that he’s thinking about you sexually. Sometimes, certain things are a sign of both. Certain signs a guy is attracted to you or is thinking about you sexually might be confusing.

How do you tell if a man is secretly attracted to you?

It can be challenging to tell if a man is secretly attracted to you sexually or is a guy who likes you in secrecy depending on the kind of guy. A good partner will show you he’s interested in some capacity, although the signs of a guy who likes you but is too afraid to tell you may be subtle at first.

Depending on the kind of guy, if a guy is interested in a woman and is trying to keep it a secret, however, the signs are more likely to be subconscious and less obvious like if he’s subconsciously sitting close to you.

What does sexual attraction feel like?

There are a number of signs of sexual attraction that you may feel if you are sexually attracted to someone. Some of these will be mental, where some might be physical.

How do you know if someone is attracted to you sexually?

Depending on the kind of guy, there are a number of signs to tell that someone might be attracted to you sexually.

Nervousness
Sexual tension
They reach out and touch your arm or shoulder
They gaze into your eyes or look at your lips
Open body language

If people comment that they feel the sexual tension between the two of you, that’s a good sign that someone’s attracted to you sexually. Another sign is that someone’s heart rate increases, though that’s not a sign of attraction and arousal that you’ll be able to pick up on yourself in many cases.

Can you feel sexual energy from someone?

Often, yes. Depending on the kind of guy, say that you’re talking to a guy you’re attracted to. You notice that he’s nervous. Perhaps, you notice that he’s nervous because you’re having an awkward conversation and he seems to be a little bit sweaty or shaky, but he is also smiling and talking excitedly. Maybe, there are some subtle touching going on. That’s sexual tension. It’s a potential sign of attraction for sure, but these are also sexual tension signs.

How do you know if there is a spark between you?

When you’re talking, you’ll feel it. That is especially true if sexual tension is mutual, as there will be a lot of signs. Often, a relationship expert, dating coach, or an expert in relationship science will tell you about body language signs and how they signify a spark between two people.

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