6 Ways To Get Your Lazy Husband To Be More Active
Updated October 09, 2019
Having a lazy husband can get on your nerves. You could be frustrated with how he never seems to do anything around the house. No one should have to carry the burden of looking after someone else when they are fully capable of doing things for themselves. If your husband is so lazy that he seems not to want to do anything, then this might be more alarming than it is frustrating. You could even be worried about him and might wonder if something else is wrong.
Your husband's laziness could be an attitude problem, or it could be an indication of something more serious. Before you look into ways to get him to be more active, it's appropriate to consider whether your husband is severely depressed. If he has some mental illness or another issue, then you might want to get him to see the doctor. Some people might need to seek treatment for having low energy levels. If you don't believe that there is a medical reason for his laziness, then you can try to think of ways to get him off of the couch.
Take a look at these six ways to get your lazy husband to be more active. These are all practical suggestions that should work for just about anyone. It might help your husband to get back into the groove so that he can feel better about himself again. You might find that it will take some time for your husband to get out of his lazy ways, but you can assist him by being a supportive spouse. Read on and see which of these methods will be practical solutions for your situation.
- Talk To Him About Your Concerns
Your husband should know about your concerns. It isn't going to be helpful to call him out and tell him that he is lazy. This is going to make him more withdrawn, and you likely won't get the results that you are hoping for. Instead, you should approach this from the standpoint of being concerned about him. Make sure that nothing is wrong and say that you notice that he hasn't been himself for a while. Make sure his health is okay and then figure out why he might be stuck in this rut of laziness.
If your husband wasn't always lazy, then it might be that he needs to get motivated again. A lack of motivation is something that can harm even the most successful people. Try to be there for him and do your best to be understanding. Your frustrations are warranted, but you can't snap your fingers and fix this issue. It's going to take some time, and you might need to be a supportive spouse for a bit while he is going through whatever is happening.
Now, if your husband was always a pretty lazy guy, then this could be a learned behavior. For example, some men grew up in households where the women took care of everything. The women did all of the dishes, and they cleaned the house. This might seem very sexist and outdated to you, but that doesn't mean that it isn't what he is used to. Your husband might not even know how to use the dishwasher or the washing machine. As absurd as that sounds, there are men out there who have zero practical skills when it comes to taking care of the house.
You might need to teach him to be a bit self-reliant. If he is lazy simply because he thinks you need to take care of everything yourself, then you can feel free to tell him otherwise. It might be best to avoid turning it into an argument, but you can tell him that he needs to help around the house. Sharing the workload is important, and he can learn how to do things. Washing clothes and vacuuming the living room aren't activities that require a college education, so he should be fine with a little training.
- Ask For Help With Things Around The House
Next, you're going to want to ask him for help around the house specifically. If you haven't been asking him to do these things, then he might not know that you need help. Even if it seems like something that anyone would pick up on, it's still going to be good to ask him. Ask him if he could do the dishes tonight so that you can handle the laundry. Try to start dividing tasks up in a way that feels natural.
He might struggle with a few things at first if he isn't used to doing chores. Some women even have trouble with husbands putting things off. Just try to get him to do things and see if he takes to it. If he does, then your marriage will likely be happier and more equal moving forward.
- Create A List Of Chores
Creating a list of chores can be a good way to keep things on schedule. It gives your husband a visual reminder of the things that he is supposed to do during the week. These can be simple tasks such as taking out the garbage, mowing the lawn, and vacuuming the floors. If he knows what he has to do, then there will be less of a reason for him to avoid the tasks. Some husbands might not be good about doing chores even when there is a chore list, but it has helped some couples.
Remember that not every man is going to respond well to being made to do things. He might feel like you are belittling him or putting him on a schedule. For some men, it'll be better to ask for help when you need it. If your husband would respond better to a more casual approach, then you should go that route. Some people don't mind being more organized, and others hate rigid structures. It's just about recognizing what is appropriate for your marriage.
- Exercise Together
Has your husband been exercising at all lately? If he is lazy, then there is a good chance that he hasn't seen a gym in quite some time. Not everyone is focused on their physical fitness, and even you might be guilty of not exercising as much as you should. This is why committing to getting back into shape as a couple is smart. You could decide to exercise together so that you can motivate one another.
Convincing a lazy husband to get off of the couch might not be easy at first. It could be smart to use the approach of making it into something that he is helping you out with. You need him there to watch you, and you need his support. If you put it like that, then he might be more likely to get up and do it for you. You can both get back into exercising, and this could help you to feel substantially better over time.
What type of exercising plan you decide to get into will depend on your current fitness levels. Some people thrive in a gym environment, and others find gyms to be too intimidating. You can exercise from home if you would like to or you could go out for walks multiple times per week. Even starting with easy exercises such as walking for thirty minutes in your neighborhood will be beneficial.
- Have More Sex
Have you been having sex very often with your husband? If you haven't been sleeping with him due to your frustrations, then it could be making him feel even lazier. Sometimes laziness is also tied to being unfulfilled, and he might be downtrodden about the whole situation. You shouldn't have to sleep with someone as a reward or anything like that. This is more about cultivating a healthy sexual relationship for the sake of your marriage.
How does this help your husband to be more active? In several ways, actually. Firstly, having sex is a physical action, and rigorous sexual activity is going to provide an aerobic workout. If you have sex multiple times per week, then it's going to be good for his health. Also, it could make him feel better about himself, which might give him some motivation to get off the couch. Sex isn't the solution to your problems, but it can be a piece of the puzzle.
- Encourage Him To Play Sports
Another potential way to get your husband to be more active is to encourage him to play sports. This might be a good idea if your husband has an interest in sports or used to be athletic before he got a bit complacent. Your husband might have friends who play basketball on the weekends or something like that. He could join them, and this could be a very good way to get some exercise in. Being able to get back into shape in a fun way is very helpful.
When you're exercising by playing sports one or two days per week, it doesn't feel like exercise. It can be very physically demanding, but that doesn't mean that it isn't fun. Your husband might come home pretty sore after the first few games of getting back into it. You can draw him a nice bath and ask him how the game went. Over time, you might notice some changes to his physique. As he gets into better shape, he'll start having more energy. This could even lead to him being more helpful around the house, so it's something that could have an overall positive impact on his life.
Online Couples Counseling is Available
Online couples counseling is also available for couples that need assistance. You might find that your marriage has several issues that need to be addressed. Your husband could need help to get over being depressed, or he might not understand what constitutes a healthy relationship dynamic. If you love your husband and you want this marriage to work, then enlisting the help of online couples' counselors makes sense. They can help you to figure out what needs to be worked on and you can start making progress.
Saving your marriage is possible, and you can lead a more satisfying life together. Your husband can transform into a person that is proud and capable. The problems that you're going through now can be solved if you can commit to the process. It won't always be easy, and there might be tough moments and situations that you will have to confront. Even so, you'll have dedicated professionals with you every step of the way.