Signs That A Women You’re Dating Is Girlfriend Material

Updated June 17, 2024by Regain Editorial Team

There’s a big difference between occasionally dating a woman and deciding to make the relationship exclusive. While your gut feelings and emotional attachment will usually be the deciding factor, there are some positive signs you can look for to indicate that the woman you’re dating would make a good girlfriend. Read on to learn more about things you can look for that might mean she’s girlfriend material.

Are you wondering whether you should make it official?

Dating vs. relationship: What’s the difference

While dating a woman and making her your girlfriend are terms people often use interchangeably, there can be a significant difference in understanding your relationship's status and clarity. If you're casually dating multiple women, you likely don't see any of them as your girlfriend. When you’re in an exclusive relationship, you’re seeing one person and working to establish a long-term intimate emotional connection

What is girlfriend material?

Girlfriend material is a popular slang term that means a woman would be a good partner and is a likely prospect for a committed relationship

When should you know if you want her to be your girlfriend?

Recent studies show that it can take men anywhere from two weeks to four months to feel in love. So, if you're experiencing intense feelings for a woman you're dating in that timeframe, you may want to think about making it official.  

Questions to ask yourself before making a commitment:

  • Are you ready for an exclusive relationship?
  • Do you prioritize her needs and feelings?
  • Are you willing to make space for her in your life and home?
  • Do you listen when she talks?
  • Are you emotionally engaged when you’re with her?
  • Has your interest in other women faded?

Signs the woman you’re dating would be a good girlfriend

You may be dating multiple women or have recently started seeing someone. If you're unsure whether you want something more, consider signs that she would be a good partner, and you should consider initiating a relationship. 

She’s laid back and manages stress well

If you’ve seen her stressed out but managing it with practical coping skills, it could indicate that she’s in tune with her mental health and aware of what she needs to feel stable. She may be someone you could rely on in a tense situation and an excellent partner to have by your side. 

She has plans for the future

Ambition is generally a favorable trait in a potential partner. Many men may start thinking of a relationship with a woman who shows she has plans to continue growing and learning until she achieves her goals. 

She’s independent

While some men enjoy a woman who needs them a lot in an established relationship, it can be overwhelming initially. If you’ve been dating a woman who shows she’d independent and has a life of her own, it may make you think about seeking a more significant part in it. 

She loves and values herself

Self-love and confidence are traits many men find desirable. If a woman you’ve been seeing demonstrates that she loves and values herself, it may make her an alluring prospective girlfriend. Self-care helps safeguard a person's mental, physical, and emotional well-being; if she takes care of herself, she may be a nurturing and caring girlfriend. 

She knows and accepts you as you are

Dating someone who sees you as you are and accepts this version of yourself without question can make her girlfriend material. Many people get into relationships to find that their partner wants to change fundamental things about them, leading to frustration and conflict. 

She brings out the best in you

If you’ve been seeing a woman who makes you want to be a better person, it may be a sign that she’d be a good girlfriend. Being inspired by someone could indicate the potential for a deeper emotional connection. 

She offers encouragement and comfort

Many people rely on their partners for emotional support. If you've been dating a woman who frequently offers encouragement, comfort, and constructive criticism, she may be girlfriend material because she’s shown that she cares and will be there for you. 

She has healthy relationships with her family and friends

You may not have been dating long enough to know much about her family, but you should ask questions about them as early as you feel comfortable. Healthy relationships with her family and long-term friendships could mean she would also make a good girlfriend. 

She likes children

For many people, the purpose of dating someone exclusively for the long term is to determine whether you are compatible for marriage. While getting married and starting a family certainly isn’t everyone’s goal, if you want children and you’re seeing a woman who doesn’t like them, you could face compatibility problems in the future. When it feels right, simply ask if she likes kids. A deeper discussion of the topic can likely wait until you know each other better. 

She respects your boundaries 

When figuring out if you want to take the next step with a woman, whether she respects your boundaries can be crucial. If someone doesn't respect your limits while you're dating casually, it's not likely to get better in a relationship. 

She can give and receive love

Many people have insecure attachment styles that can make giving and receiving love complex—often due to traumatic events in their childhood or past. While that certainly doesn't mean they can't be in a meaningful relationship, you may have to adjust your expectations and learn to love her how she needs to be loved. Explore adult attachment issues to learn more about how people form and maintain relationships. 

If you are experiencing trauma, support is available. Please see our Get Help Now page for more resources.

She has similar values

Studies show that relationships are often more successful when both partners share similar values and outlooks on life. If you have different values, but she’s made it clear that she respects yours, it could also mean she’d make a good partner. 

She makes you laugh

Laughter is scientifically proven to boost your mood and reduce stress. She may make a good girlfriend if you're dating a woman who consistently makes you laugh and can make you feel better with her funny, upbeat attitude.  

She cares about other people

If a woman demonstrates that she's compassionate and cares for others, it could indicate that she would make a good girlfriend. If she shows that she cares about people, she will likely be a nurturing, caring girlfriend too. 

She isn’t afraid to tell you when you’re wrong

It can be nice to consider a relationship with a woman who isn’t afraid to let you know when you’re wrong. Finding someone who will challenge you to be better can be an attractive trait for many men. 

Are you wondering whether you should make it official?

Reach out for help

Deciding that you’re ready to move toward a long-term, committed relationship and potentially toward marriage is a big step. Knowing what you want from a relationship and the areas where you might need to work on yourself before committing to someone can be helpful. You may benefit from speaking with a therapist for the support and guidance of a mental health professional as you work to create a lasting connection with someone. 

How therapy can help decide what you want in a girlfriend

If you think you’re ready for a serious relationship and focusing your time and attention on one woman, consider working with a licensed therapist online through a virtual therapy platform focused on relationship issues like Regain. If you’re a parent or guardian looking for ways to support your adolescent child through the turbulent early dating years, contact TeenCounseling for information about online therapy for kids from 12 to 19. Therapy can help you identify what characteristics you value in a potential partner, develop communication skills, and help you build the emotional intelligence, awareness, and literacy to recognize, understand, and express your own feelings and needs. 

Numerous recent studies show no appreciable difference between in-person and online therapy outcomes. However, virtual treatments are often cheaper, have shorter wait times, and let you fit therapy into a busy schedule through phone, video call, or online chat. One benefit of teletherapy over in-person treatment is a more comprehensive selection of available therapists. You can easily find another therapist if you don't find someone who works well with your personality and situation. 


It can be hard to know when you should make it official with the woman you’re dating and ask her to be your girlfriend. The information in this article can offer insight into signs that she's girlfriend material and how therapy can help you decide what you value in a relationship. 

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