Types Of Domestic Violence Help Out There

If you're currently experiencing domestic abuse, it's important to know that help is out there. There are people, companies, organizations, and a whole lot more that want to and can help you. It's all about finding the type of help you need. Remember, you don't need to do this alone, In fact, it's possibly best if you don't do it alone. Domestic abuse can be extremely dangerous, and the last thing you want is to get caught in an even more dangerous situation when you're trying to leave. 

Keep reading to learn more about the different types of domestic abuse and how you can find help to get out of these potentially dangerous situations.

Types of domestic abuse

Before we get into the types of help available for domestic abuse, it's important that you understand what domestic abuse is. Most people think of physical abuse when they think of domestic abuse. While this is ceertainly a type of domestic abuse, it's not the only type of abuse. It can be the easiest to recognize, however, because it generally leaves visible marks such as cuts, bruises, broken bones, etc. But there are other types of abuse that are also damaging to a person—even if the damage isn't outwardly visible.

Verbal abuse, emotional abuse, and psychological abuse are all part of domestic abuse. Many people that are in these types of abusive relationships often have a hard time recognizing that it is, in fact, abuse that they are experiencing. They might not realize that all relationships aren't like that. Or they may (erroneously) feel that they deserve what's happening to them.

Abuse is meant to cause you to lose confidence in yourself and believe that you are worthless. When you feel this way, you become dependent on your abuser, feeling that you are lucky to have them because they put up with you and all your imperfections. In reality, they have just lowered your self-esteem to the point that you do not see the truth. The longer you stay in an abusive relationship, the harder it is to leave.

There is no type of abuse that is OK. And there is nothing that you can do to deserve being abused in any way. When you recognize that you are in an abusive relationship, it's important that you take the next step—getting help.

Types of domestic violence help

If you recognize that you are in a domestic abuse situation, you have several choices when it comes to getting help. You need to examine your particular situation and decide what will work best for you.

Leaving

The first thing that you can do if you are a victim of domestic abuse is to leave on your own. Again, it may be best not to go entirely alone. Find a friend or family member, someone you can count on, to help you move your belongings out of your space or keep you from changing your mind if you know you need to leave. Getting out may be as simple as walking out the front door while your partner is at work or away with friends or as difficult as trying to sneak out when they aren't paying attention. No matter what it's going to take, make sure you at least tell someone what you're planning and arrange to check in with them afterwards.

It's also a good idea to have a place to go where your partner won't be able to find you. Then, only tell the necessary people where you are staying until you can get back on your feet in a place of your own.

Get a restraining order

Next, getting a restraining order is an important next step. When you go to the police, you will need information about the abuse itself. Keep in mind that the police generally deal with physical or sexual abuse, not mental or emotional abuse. That doesn't mean that mental or emotional abuse is any less serious, just that the police aren't well equipped to help you or give you a restraining order for it. Also keep in mind that, in essence, a restraining order is just a piece of paper. You'll use it if the person comes back, but you'll also need a way to protect yourself in addition to that restraining order.

Have support

Friends and family are an extremely important part of the process when it comes to leaving a domestic abuse situation. The longer the situation has been ongoing, the more distant your friendships and relationships with others may have gotten, but that doesn't mean that those people won't help you if you call. Chances are they're aware of the problem and may have been waiting for their opportunity to step in. All you need to do is ask them to help, and that's all it's likely take to rekindle the relationship and get their assistance.

A shelter is another place you can go for help if you're leaving a domestic abuse situation. Shelters can be for families, for men, or for women. In general, a shelter will be separated so that men and women are not near each other. Shelters are generally a short-term solution, but they can help you get set up with housing, jobs, legal help, mental health help, and a whole lot more.

Therapy

Therapy can help you see what you need to do to restore yourself after being in an abusive relationship. If you are still in the relationship, couples therapy can help you and your partner learn what changes need to be made for your relationship to carry on more healthily.

If your partner is unwilling to go to therapy, then you can go on your own. The therapist will be able to help you see how to set boundaries to yourself. They will also help you to learn how to identify unhealthy behaviors in your relationship that you may have been missing.

Since a therapist is an outside third person and doesn't know either of you personally, you can trust that you are getting the professional advice of someone with the knowledge and expertise to help you.

If you are in a physically abusive relationship, then it's important that you get out before you are seriously injured.

Staying

Now, it's important to back up a step and focus on something else. Maybe you're just not ready to leave yet. Maybe you're not sure that you're a victim of domestic abuse or you know that you are, but you believe your partner can change and will change. Maybe you just can't imagine leaving either because you don't know how, or you don't want to give up yet. That's okay, too. 

Understanding the signs of domestic violence may help convince you to stay away from an abusive partner and realize how it affects you. Know that there is a lot of help out there. For you, the first step may be seeking out professional help. Not that there's anything wrong with you, but professional help can allow you to look at the situation objectively and see what you want to do next more clearly.

If you're in a situation that's dangerous, getting help is important and maybe talking with someone about what you're going through and how you're feeling will help you to make a definitive choice about what to do. The most important thing is making sure that it's your decision. No one can tell you to leave or not to leave your partner (even if they think they can, it's not their choice). You are the one who has to be comfortable with the decision that you make.

Again, if you are a victim of physical abuse, it's important to get out before you are seriously hurt. You need to get away to get the help that you need and make sure that the other person doesn't continue to hurt you.

The hard truth

Unfortunately, the truth is that someone abusive is extremely unlikely to change. There are a few people who can get professional help and make changes in their lives, but those changes likely won't happen during your relationship. The best thing that you can do is walk away, for your health and wellbeing—and even for theirs.

Seeking help and trying to make changes while you are in the relationship is nearly impossible. If you have a hard time walking away, talk with a professional. Tell yourself that it's possible that they will get the help they need, and it's possible that you will be able to return to your relationship in the future, but now is not a safe time to stay.

Once you are safe, you can address the next steps.

Get online help for domestic violence

If you're struggling with leaving a domestic abuse situation and you are in immediate danger, you need to leave the situation as soon as possible—seeking help from family, friends, or an organization nearby that can help you.

If you're in a situation that does not pose an immediate threat, but is not sustainable, the first thing you might consider is seeking out professional help. A professional can help you understand your thoughts and feelings and all of your options with a completely objective view. 

Online can be a good way to get help. You don't need to leave the house and can find a time when you're alone to connect with a therapist. There's no need to try to figure out a way to get out to a physical office.

Takeaway

Your friends and family, if they see what is happening, will likely tell you to leave immediately, but a mental health professional, like those at Regain, will help you to understand your options better and to come to the best decision for yourself, not for anyone else. Regain's therapists are experts in relationships, and you can chat via text, phone call, or video chat, whichever one best fits your needs.

You do not have to stay in a dangerous situation. If you find yourself in need of help—reach out to get out.