Should You Hire A Dating Coach? Here Is What They Can Do For You

Updated April 10, 2024by Regain Editorial Team

Dating can be difficult for anyone. It's especially frustrating to feel that no matter how much effort you make, you still can't form or maintain a successful relationship. Many in these situations choose to hire a dating coach. Regardless of how long you've struggled with dating, a coach can help you too. 

Among other things, dating coaches try to help people overcome insecurities or potential confidence issues to engage in the dating scene more successfully. Here's what hiring a dating coach can do for you.

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Learn what a dating coach can do for you

Give unbiased tips

Many people turn to their close friends for a source of dating possibilities. Your friends likely have family and friends outside the circles you frequent, and for some, the “friends-as-matchmaker” role may even work out. But because your friends are invested in the outcomes, utilizing friends to meet people for dating often doesn’t work. 

For example, your friend may have a cousin who has been single for a while. Because they want to help you and their cousin, they may stretch the limits of what you have in common to set you up together. Additionally, when your friends “play matchmaker,” it may take longer to end a relationship that isn't working, partly because you don't want to upset the friend who brought you together. 

It may be that whenever you see that friend, they're excited about your budding relationship and inquire about how it's going. Because you may be worried about letting them down, you may be more likely to say things are fine even though you're unhappy.

Your friends or family may also inadvertently give you advice that reflects their current situations or mood, which often isn’t helpful. For instance, if the person advising you is in the middle of a divorce, that could reflect in their suggestions on whom you should date or whether you should look for something serious.

Complications such as these don't exist with a dating coach. If you meet someone through your dating coach's guidance, it isn't likely to be someone they suggest because they know them. Your coach will not have a personal investment in your commitment to any particular person. They want to see you get the results you want.

Because of their unbiased opinion, you're also more likely to be truthful with them about what you're looking for and how your dates are going. This allows you to divulge details and explore what you like or don't like about the date. You can be completely honest.

Suggest new places to meet people

Often, the places people claim are typical zones for meeting people aren’t the best suggestions. The chances you’ll meet someone you have a lot in common with at the grocery store or a bar are slim. 

A dating coach will help you look for dates in places that say more about your personality or the personality of people you want to meet. For example, if you love tennis, try joining a league. Or, if you’re passionate about a charity cause, consider attending an event. A dating coach can help you develop new ideas for places to scout out potential matches based on your interests, habits, and available free time.

Help with your conversation skills


Having meaningful, entertaining conversations is one of the most important parts of dating after the initial attraction or match. This is, after all, the period where you get to know each other. Some people have no problem getting dates but flounder once they’re out with someone. Good dating coaches will have tips for starting a conversation when you and your date go silent. They can help you beyond small talk and start meaningful conversations with your date. 

You may feel shy or awkward, but having a plan for handling awkward silences can help. Prepare yourself with the right kinds of questions or have some topics in mind ahead of time. You can also practice having conversations with your dating coach. This creates a safe space for you to try out different conversation styles. Your coach will be able to tell you what habits or quirks they're noticing, as well as your strengths.

Boost confidence

Likely, if you're considering hiring a dating coach, what you currently do in your dating life is not working, but you probably don't know what to do. Sometimes, even if we attempt to change strategies, we’ll still use those that stay within our comfort zone. A dating coach can help you break free from that comfort zone, helping you avoid the pitfalls you may have been experiencing.  

A coach can help you find ways to deviate from your usual choices by boosting your confidence. For some, this may include trying a new wardrobe or hairstyle. Others get a boost in confidence when they learn something new. If you’re one of those people, a dating coach may help you consider new hobbies. New hobbies don't just expose you to new people (i.e., potential dates); they also help you form more self-confidence as you learn new skills.

Your dating coach may help boost your confidence by providing unbiased opinions about your strengths and potential- just be sure to be open and honest with them about yourself and your habits.

Help you find self-love

Your coach should focus on finding a compatible match for you and helping you see that you are worthy of love. Their priority should be helping you to love yourself. Self-love leads to confidence, and confidence is attractive.

Help you learn what you want

Sometimes we fall into patterns we adhere to after they are no longer useful. This happens in relationships and dating too. If you feel like you keep picking people you’re incompatible with, you may want to consider whether there is some pattern at work- a dating or socializing habit that you need to quit to find more compatible dates.

Many people don’t recognize their negative dating patterns, and if you don't know them, you can't change them. When you hire a dating coach, they may be able to help you identify patterns you didn't realize you were following. Then, you can break them and start utilizing habits that better serve you. 

Learn what a dating coach can do for you

Give pointers for dating online profiles

Because many people seek out dates online, creating a good virtual dating profile is essential. Several aspects go into a good profile, including what kinds of pictures to add (pictures are a must), what type of information to include about yourself, and what information may be unnecessary for a dating profile. You may not be an expert at this and may need clarification on what to put on these sites. A coach can help you form a plan to make your profile look appealing and represent you honestly.

Give honest feedback about dates

A dating coach will help you before a date during the selection process. But they are also a valuable ally in analyzing the dates you go on. You can talk to them about how things went and get honest feedback about your dates' qualities. This is useful because you'll likely go on dates with several different people during your time with a coach. It's uncommon to find the right long-term match on the first date if a long-term relationship is what you're looking for.

Understand the right things to look for

Most people understand that there are particular relationship red flags to avoid. But we don't always know precisely what they are or recognize them if we come across them. Your coach can help you understand and identify what to look out for.

Because dating coaches work with various people in different life stages, they may help you realize an important quality you didn't know to look for in potential dates. They can also help you pick quality partners by knowing what traits you should aim for and helping you avoid “settling for less.” many of these qualities make a big difference, but you may not recognize them without a guide.

Improve your current relationship

Many relationship experts advise that continuing to date your partner is one of the best ways to ensure a happy long-term relationship. Dating coaches aren't just for single people or those who are casually seeing someone (or a few people). They can also be helpful for established relationships. If your partnered dating life has slowed, a dating coach can help you find that energy again. For instance, they may help you develop new ideas for dates to go on or stay-at-home date ideas. A coach can also help you look at your partner with fresh eyes and interact in a new way. 

Dating support is available online

Dating may still be frustrating, but having a coach can make you stand out and fulfill your dating goals better. You can find a dating coach through friends, family, and common-interest groups, but most choose the internet to search for a dating coach. There are dating coaches available to meet you face-to-face or online. Regardless of how you decide to meet them, searching for reviews about the coach and checking their credentials, qualifications, and experience before hiring is essential.

Virtual dating coaches can be very convenient., particularly if you live in a less populated area without coaches available to meet in person. For some, traffic and scheduling may also act as a deterrent to seeing a coach in person. Others may feel uncomfortable visiting a traditional office because of issues of discretion. 

Many clients find online counseling as effective as traditional models- not just for gaining advice on dating and communication but also for overall well-being. You can speak with a Regain counselor via phone, text, online messaging, and video chat to get started on the path to better dating experiences. 

Online platforms like Regain connect people with counselors who help with relationship difficulties and address the common challenges individuals face that may cause relationship difficulties. 

Below are some reviews of Regain counselors from people who improved their dating situations.

Regain counselor reviews

"My girlfriend and I have been working with Alison for about four months now, and with her help and guidance, we have strengthened our relationship tenfold. Her communication style is amazing, and she really strives to make the best of our time with one another. If you're looking for a counselor you can put your faith in with the whole experience, she's the one to go to."

"Sarah has been comforting to me through a very difficult transition. She has helped me to regain confidence and listen to my intuition. She is a great listener and has encouraged me to rediscover and use my voice."

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