The Law Of Attraction: How Can Positive And Negative Thoughts Impact Relationships?

Whether you want a new job, more money, or a better relationship, proponents of the law of attraction suggest that adjusting your thoughts is the most crucial step. The law of attraction posits that positive thoughts can bring about positive experiences. This belief can be applied to many areas of life, including relationships. While there are several criticisms of the law of attraction, the idea that a person’s thoughts can meaningfully impact their life is much more widely accepted, and there are a number of ways to leverage this idea. 

What is the law of attraction, and how does it view energy and the mind?

The law of attraction is a spiritual belief that suggests that positive or negative thoughts can bring about positive or negative experiences in a person’s life. Part of the New Thought movement, the idea was developed by Phineas Quimby in the 19th century. 

The power of the mind

A central idea in the law of attraction is that your thoughts have immense power and influence over the outcomes in your life. In other words, according to the law of attraction, what the mind focuses on influences the outcomes in a person’s life. In other words, the law states that thoughts determine experiences. 

Like energy attracts like energy

Another key idea in the law of attraction is that “like energy attracts like energy.” Therefore, if you have positive thoughts, you will bring about positive experiences that are a “vibrational match” for those thoughts. 

What are the three main laws of attraction?

There are often thought to be three main principles or laws within the law of attraction:

1. Like attracts like: This universal law generally refers to the idea that positive thoughts bring about positive experiences.
2. Nature hates a vacuum: This suggests that removing negative thoughts makes room for more positive thoughts to come in, and that filling this space is important, as the subconscious mind will fill the space with something regardless. 
3. The present is perfect: This idea encourages individuals to view the present as perfect, and to find ways to make the most of it. 

Using the laws of attraction

A person who aligns with this belief may use the law of attraction for many different purposes in their own life. Some common goals include the following:

• Attracting financial abundance 
• Working to achieve success in their career
• Trying to attract people, such as a romantic partner, into their lives

People may draw on various methods when practicing the law of attraction, such as creating a vision board, reciting positive affirmations, and reading prominent law of attraction quotes and books. 

What are the criticisms and drawbacks of the law of attraction?

It can be important to note that there are several criticisms and potential drawbacks of the law of attraction. Being aware of this discourse may help you take an informed approach and determine for yourself what you think about the practice. 

Common criticisms of the law of attraction

Below are some of the common criticisms of the law of attraction:

• Some consider it “pseudoscience” with no empirical backing.
• Some contend that the law of attraction puts the blame on people for the hardships or disadvantages they face, ignoring factors like systemic inequalities and traumatic events that individuals have no control over.
• Some view the hyper-focus on positive thinking as ignoring and discounting the necessity of taking action to achieve one’s goals.

How can positive and negative thoughts impact relationship outcomes?

There is a range of criticisms of the law of attraction. However, a more widely accepted idea is that a person’s thoughts can impact their emotions and behaviors, which can impact various areas of life, including relationships. This concept forms the basis for cognitive behavioral therapy, an evidence-based modality for treating a variety of mental health concerns.

The impact of positive thinking 

The impact of negative thoughts

In contrast, having negative thoughts about yourself, your partner, or your relationship might contribute to things like the following:

• Viewing yourself as undeserving of love, which may lead you to withdraw from your partner 
• Viewing your emotions as faulty and incorrect, so suppressing your own needs, which may lead to resentment 
• Not trusting your partner and the relationship, which may lead to conflict and insecurity

What else can you do to encourage positive thinking and support mental health?

Beyond the law of attraction, there is a wide range of strategies you can try to become a more positive person. Below are a few options to consider:

• Start a gratitude journal to develop a regular practice of giving thanks.
• Try practical exercises for reducing stress and cultivating positive emotions, such as practicing a loving-kindness meditation.
• Book an appointment with a therapist for professional support.

Supporting mental health in therapy

In online or in-person therapy sessions, a qualified therapist can draw on evidence-based approaches like cognitive behavioral therapy to address mental health and relationship concerns. For those experiencing persistent negative thoughts or emotions, leaving the house may seem difficult, making online therapy a convenient alternative. Individuals can attend online therapy on their own or with their partners.

In general, CBT involves identifying negative thoughts and behaviors and then using established techniques to replace those negative patterns with more constructive ones. Research shows that CBT delivered online can be effective for a range of concerns, including decreasing depression and anxiety levels and increasing quality of life.