Loving Your Best Friend: Marriage Tips To Keep The Friendship Alive

Updated April 8, 2024by Regain Editorial Team

Love and friendship can be important parts of a marriage, but that doesn't mean we always remember to focus on them. As the days go on and we’re in the relationship for an extended period, we may lose sight of the things that are most important to us. Spouses who share a deep friendship with one another often report having some of the most satisfying unions. The trick can be knowing how to keep this sense of friendship alive. In this article, we’ll be exploring different tips you can use to foster friendship in your marriage and strengthen the bond you share with your spouse. 

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Having trouble keeping the friendship in your marriage alive?

Make time for date nights

Making time to spend with your spouse can be vital, and date nights can be just one way to have quality time together. Research shows that couples who go on regular date nights with one another report stronger, happier marriages, more sexual satisfaction, and higher levels of stability

An important aspect of friendship can be spending time together and enjoying one another's company. When you are best friends with someone, you hang out often and create new memories together. You talk about anything on your mind and grow in intimacy. Marriage can take this a step further, but only if couples are committed to the relationship they share. No matter how strong your marriage is, it can be imperative to continue to put work into it. If you aren’t taking the time to get to know your spouse as the days and years go by, it can be difficult to maintain a friendship with them, which can affect the quality of your marriage. 

If you hope for your partner to be not only your spouse but also your best friend, it’s likely that you’ll need to continually invest some time into them. Making plans for date nights can help ensure that connecting with your partner becomes a habit. Instead of wondering when you’ll get to connect next, you can put it on the calendar, and both look forward to it. Date nights don’t have to be expensive or over the top. A nice, relaxing dinner at home can do the trick. Making a conscious effort to spend time with one another can make all the difference. 

Laugh together

Laughter can bring people together, and it can also keep the spark alive in a relationship. The times when you and your partner couldn’t stop laughing about something might be some of the most memorable. When you’re best friends with someone, you can be your complete self around them. Whether you’re cracking jokes, being goofy, or watching funny videos together, laughter can draw you and your partner closer than ever. 

Many people take marriage very seriously, and there can be many aspects of a marriage that feel challenging or difficult to get through. Conflict can be inevitable and disagreements commonplace. However, couples that know how to laugh together may get through these bumps in the road more easily. Additionally, being able to laugh with one another when things get too serious may help some spouses express themselves more effortlessly.

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Reminisce

Looking back at old times can be a powerful way to strengthen your relationship. The history that you have together is what makes your relationship unique, and it can be important to keep this at the forefront of your mind. Reminiscing with your partner can help remind each of you why you are in the marriage in the first place. If you’re in a rough patch in your relationship, it could be useful to remember all the positive moments you’ve shared together. You’ve gotten through tough times in the past, and you can do it again. 

A solid friendship doesn't mean that you're always happy and getting along. We all have our bad days, and we all make mistakes. Being a best friend means that you acknowledge those struggles, and you work together to fix them. The bond that you have with your spouse is likely worth fighting for. After all, you chose to marry them, which means you must have felt very strongly for them at some point. Keep the memories that you have close to your heart and draw from them when you need some extra encouragement. Fight to keep your partnership whole, happy, and healthy, even when it’s hard. 

If you struggle to remember the good times, consider keeping a photo album. Snap a picture when you are doing something memorable and write down the events of the day. When you have a fight, or you come to a crossroads, pull the album out. Look at it together and talk about the way you felt in the photos. This can not only help you to remember the happy times in your relationship but can also inspire you to keep creating positive memories with one another.

Accept each other's flaws

No one is perfect and humans have a way of loving one another regardless of our downfalls. When the novelty of being married wears off, you might find yourself annoyed with your partner's flaws or quirks. If you want to keep your marriage intact and remain friends along the way, it can be important to accept each other as you are. Best friends don’t try to change one another; rather, they encourage each other to be the very best versions of themselves. Our flaws are what make us who we are. Even though it can be easy to get caught up in wishing that your relationship was perfect, it can be crucial to recognize that every marriage has its struggles. If you can accept your partner for who they are and love them anyway, you can build a union that lasts.

Support one another

Being supportive can be important in all types of relationships, but especially in marriage. Working as a team during everyday events, but also in the midst of disagreements, can help keep your bond strong throughout the years. Being a supportive spouse can mean respecting your partner’s opinion, showing up for them when they need you, and working through conflict together. Best friends can rely on one another, especially during times of distress. When you need someone to turn to, your spouse should ideally top the list of people that you reach out to. 

There is rarely a bond stronger than that between husband and wife. You get the opportunity to have a best friend and a lover all in one. Although it can be tough to keep the friendship aspect alive in your marriage, doing so can be vital to the health and happiness of your union. By making your spouse a priority and taking steps to treat them like a true best friend, you can help ensure that your marriage succeeds even through the ups and downs of life.

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Having trouble keeping the friendship in your marriage alive?

Online counseling with Regain

Relationships aren't always easy. From time to time, you may come across something in your path that you need an extra hand to help with. Relationship counseling can be a powerful resource for couples that want to succeed but need to learn new tools to get there. The therapists at Regain are fully accredited professionals that can help regardless of the area you’re struggling in. Regain offers individual and couples counseling, meaning you can participate in sessions alone or with your partner. Online counseling can be an ideal option for spouses with demanding careers, stay-at-home parents, or couples with children. Although it can take hard work and time, building a happier, healthier marriage is possible. 

The effectiveness of online counseling 

According to the American Association of Marriage and Family, more than 97% of couples report getting adequate support from couples therapy. Researchers have since tried to determine whether online couples therapy could produce similar results. In one study, they found that an online videoconferencing intervention called Couple CARE increased relationship satisfaction by changing each partner’s behavior in the relationship. Couples were able to identify their own maladaptive behaviors and make concrete changes to improve their bond with their partner. Individually, many of them experienced more positive mental health outcomes, which likely contributed to their ability to communicate, respond, and cooperate with their significant other to reduce conflict and increase connection. 

Takeaway

Being married to your best friend can be a rewarding journey. You two know each other deeply, enjoy one another’s company, and are committed to making your relationship work for a lifetime. A marriage built on a foundation of friendship may feel easy at first but get more challenging over time as marital issues and life stressors start to get in the way. Staying connected to your partner can be vital through the ups and downs, which is where therapy can be helpful. Whether you’re going through a crisis or are in need of marriage maintenance, a couples therapist can equip you and your partner with the tools to build a stronger, healthier relationship. It can be imperative to reach out for support early on instead of waiting and hoping that your situation will improve. Whenever you feel ready to take the next step in your marriage, don’t hesitate to seek support from a therapist.

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