What Can I Do To Save My Relationship When I Hate Everyone?

Updated April 5, 2024by Regain Editorial Team

Is your relationship struggling due to your attitude toward others? Some people feel as if they hate relationships with others, and they might have a difficult time getting along with people. People who enjoy solitude or who have become distrustful of other humans might have a tough time maintaining a fulfilling romantic connection with someone. If you’re worried about saving your relationship due to hatred of people, then you’re going to need to consider many things.

Do you really hate people?

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Firstly, you should try to think about whether you hate other people. Hate is an incredibly powerful word, and this might not be an accurate descriptor. You might say something like “I hate everyone” when you mean “I find people to be very frustrating.” Some people don’t connect with others on a social level easily. You might find people to be annoying, and maybe you even have a reason to be distrustful toward others due to past trauma.

Regardless, the simple fact that you want to save your relationship is a sign that you wish for things to improve. If you hated everyone, then you wouldn’t care to be in a relationship in the first place. Knowing this, you should be able to try to turn things around a little bit at a time.

Your significant other is with you for a reason, and he or she might be willing to work with you on your social issues. Many people have been able to receive help from the expert counselors at Regain to change the way that they look at the world.

What makes you hate people?

It’s also very important to try to figure out what exactly makes you hate people in the first place. When people have problems interacting with others, there is usually a reason for it. You might find people to be very frustrating due to not being able to relate to them. If you can try to think about things from the perspective of other people, then you might have an easier time empathizing with what they’re going through.

Some people automatically dislike others due to experiences that they have had in the past. For example, a past traumatic experience where someone took advantage of you could cause you to be distrustful moving forward. This is unfortunate because many people might be able to bring a lot of joy into your life if you allow them to get to know you. It’s possible to move past traumatic experiences by working with a therapist, and this can help you to start the process of healing.

Saving your relationship is possible when you work on figuring out why you seem to hate others. People can change, and your personality can evolve. You might feel like most people are unbearable right now, but you could completely change your tune once you meet a few special individuals. Your current romantic partner is likely one of those special people if you’re working on trying to fix the relationship. You’re not alone in dealing with problems like this, and you can learn to stop hating others.

Try not to focus on the negative

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One of the biggest problems that you’re likely dealing with is focusing on negative things. When you focus on the bad qualities that people have, then most people are going to seem annoying. The truth is that human beings are imperfect creatures. They tend to be selfish, and they might even sometimes say hurtful things. Even so, humans also have the capacity for love, and there is great beauty in learning to build connections with other people.

Instead of focusing on the things that you don’t like about others, you could try to pay more attention to things that you do like. Even small things such as liking how someone is a very hard worker could be a start when you’re trying to open up your heart. You can apply this idea in many areas of your life so that you can start to open up more. It might take time to change the way that you think about the world, but it can be done.

Lower your expectations

Hating other people might wind up being caused by having high expectations. If you expect too much out of other people, then there is a high chance that they will let you down. As mentioned earlier, people are far from perfect. Everyone has flaws, and no one is going to be able to meet high expectations constantly. You have to be reasonable about things, and you need to understand that people will make mistakes.

Try to be understanding when other people let you down. Small letdowns such as not being able to meet up for lunch shouldn’t change the way that you think about someone. Likewise, you need to understand that people will sometimes be in a bad mood and might not come across as nice as usual.

This shouldn’t cause you to hate a person due to them having one bad day. Everyone has issues, and trying to lower your expectations a bit might help you to have more fulfilling relationships moving forward.

Talk with your partner about your concerns

Take the time to talk to your partner about your concerns. If you feel like your relationship is on the rocks due to your attitude toward others, then you should let your partner know. They will be able to talk to you openly and honestly. This should make it so that you can figure out what needs to be worked on. You might even be worried about your relationship, failing for no reason.

If there are issues that are holding your relationship back, then you can decide to tackle things together. If you’re committed to each other, then you can start trying to think about ways to change what is wrong. If your negative attitude is harming the relationship, then you can work on trying to change. This might not be easy to do by yourself, but you’ll have the support of your partner. It might also be beneficial to consider working with a therapist.

Potential anger issues

Some people who feel like they hate others will experience anger issues. This can be a big problem in a relationship. If you’re getting mad and lashing out at your partner, then you need to figure out ways to cool down. Thankfully, many anger management techniques can work for you. For instance, many people use the technique of removing themselves from the situation and counting to ten once they start to feel anger bubbling to the surface.

Your anger issues can be helped by attended anger management sessions. Many therapists can help you with issues like this. Don’t hesitate to reach out if your anger problems are impacting your relationship. You can learn to cope with feelings of anger while addressing the reasons why you get so angry at others.

List reasons why you love your partner

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You must love your partner since you’re dedicated to making the relationship work. If you’re worried about your negative side being too overwhelming, then you should try to combat it using positive things. You could list the things that you love about your partner. If you ever start to feel like you’re becoming annoyed or if you start to hate your partner, then you can try to remember what you love about them.

Relieve stress

Stress could be playing a significant role when it comes to your negative feelings, as well. Are you overworking yourself or putting yourself into too many stressful situations? You might need to unwind more often. Spending some time doing things that make you feel good can make a big difference.

When it comes to maintaining a healthy relationship, it’s necessary to take some time out for yourself. Spend a bit of time relaxing by yourself when necessary. Doing fun things with your significant other can make a difference as well. You need to make sure that you’re keeping your stress levels low so that you aren’t getting too upset or angry toward other people. Dedicate a bit of time to a hobby that you love, and you might find yourself feeling more positive about life in general.

Consider signing up for online therapy

Consider signing up for online therapy to get some help. Remember that you don’t have to face these issues alone. Some dedicated online therapists can help you out as a couple. Online couples counseling is a great way to work through issues that are holding you back. If you sign up today, then you can get started on overcoming your issues with hating others.

You might not even truly hate other people. Issues with past trauma can be worked on in the therapy sessions. You’re going to come out of this experience feeling like a better person who can maintain a healthy relationship. Don’t feel like your relationship is going to fail when you have people who are ready to help you work on things today. You can find the right balance in your life, and you might start forming bonds with people besides your significant other after making progress.

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