4 Signs He Is Interested In You After The First Date

Updated March 15, 2024by Regain Editorial Team
“Things are so fresh after the first date and certain signs might not be clear. Make sure to remember that it is early on and to also think about the signs you are giving him about your interest. With time and experience, his intentions should become more clear.” - Ryan Smith, LPC, NCC

First dates can be nerve-wracking. Whether you are meeting people on a dating app, in person, or through a friend, the first date is where the rubber meets the road, so to speak. You may have engaged in some flirting via text message beforehand. Or, you may have had a conversation on the phone or via messaging through an app, but you haven't yet met face-to-face. It could be important to meet in person with the full force of body language to see if there is a spark you would like to pursue. 

Perhaps you decide to meet him for drinks at your favorite happy hour spot. Maybe you both show up and have a great evening talking over drinks. Now you’re back at home and wondering how the date went and is he still interested. You may be wondering when to text after the first date. Specifically, you might be wondering whether you should text him right away or wait.

How do you know if a first date went well?

You could spend hours, days, or weeks overanalyzing your first date, picking apart everything that was said or done. You might be looking for first date sparks, for instance. Or you could be trying to determine if your date actually liked you, or if it went well enough to have a second date. 

Here are some signs a first date went well: 

It was easy to talk to each other

Getty/MoMo Productions
Dating can be challenging

One of the best indicators that the date went well is how easy it was to talk to each other. Conversations can lag during first dates, and the lulls can make for awkward silences. This could also make it difficult to pay attention, or it might even make you feel uncomfortable. Still, a few lulls in the conversation may be normal, and if there’s mutual interest, they will likely pass quickly. 

When two people find it easy to talk together, it usually shows they like how the other person thinks. Through deeper and longer conversations, guys may reveal more thoughts and feelings below the surface. They might do this through both their words and their body language. 

You both had a chance to talk

Few things are worse on a first date than never being able to get a word in during the conversation. When one person dominates the conversation, it can feel more like a monologue than a date. When your date dominates the conversation, you do get a chance to hear about them and their life, but it’s such a fire hydrant of words that you may often get bored. This can be particularly true when you aren’t able to add anything to the conversation. If he can’t stop talking, it might be hard to tell if he’s interested in you or not. 

When you both get a chance to talk on a date, you may be able get to know each other with reciprocity and mutual respect. You also get to experience each other’s eye contact and body language, which is a big step-up from just texting or talking on the phone. This way, you get to know about him and his life, and he gets to know you as well. 

You laugh a lot

Laughing with someone is a surefire indicator that you are having a good time. Maybe it’s laughing over dad jokes or funny work stories. The content doesn’t matter. What matters is that you are at ease enough to let loose and laugh together. That’s why prompting laughter – even if his joke wasn’t the funniest – is one of the quickest ways to build attraction between the two of you. If you come away from the date with an inside joke or two, it’s usually a sign that both parties had fun. 

You felt at ease

You may have butterflies in your stomach at the start or feel nervous about meeting a new person. That’s normal. If your anxiety remains throughout the date, though, or gets worse, it’s not likely you’ll have a good date. Moreover, your date may be able to read this anxiety from your body language. This could make them feel uncomfortable and anxious in turn. 

If, however, your nerves settle and you find yourself comfortable around this person, the first date is more likely to go well for both parties. The more comfortable you are with the other person – and the less anxious you feel – the more you can be yourself. 

The date went longer than expected

Maybe you both lost track of time. Perhaps one of you suggested grabbing dinner, dessert, or after-dinner drinks. Whatever the reason, sometimes dates go longer than expected. When a date runs long, it’s usually a good sign. It may mean you’re both having a good time and don’t want the experience to end. Plus, it gives you more of a chance to get to know the other person.

Is he into you?

No matter how good (or bad) the date goes, you may still come away with questions. These might include: “Does he like me?”, “Does he want to date me?”, or “How does a guy text when he likes you?” One way to gauge if he likes you or not is if the first date went well. You can also look at other indicators such as body language. If he had a good time and is exhibiting positive body language, it’s likely he’ll want to have an encore with a second date. A second date usually means he likes you.

However, we can all be blindsided at times. We think a first date goes well, but then we never hear from the person again. We’ve all felt the sting of ghosting, often without ever learning the reasons why. So, how do you tell if a guy is interested in you after the first date? Here are some tell-tale signs:

He’ll tell you he had a good time

It may be advisable to ignore that three-day rule or any other imaginary standard that dictates how long a guy should wait to contact you after a date. If he likes you or if he’s interested in a second date, he’ll probably text or call you the next day and tell you what a good time he had.

Not only is this a confirmation that the date went well, but it may also be a sign of respect and reflect his desire to keep the lines of communication open. The more he wants to communicate, the more you’ll be able to tell that he’s into you.

He’ll want to be social media friends

Getty/AnnaStills

If a guy likes you, he’s probably going to want to communicate with you. Today, that means social media. If he asks for your Facebook profile or your Twitter handle, he’s not likely trying to increase his follower count. Instead, it probably means he wants to stay connected to you. Even this long-distance solution can lead to dates in the future, and he may be banking on that possibility.

Sometimes, it can be a bit off-putting to invite someone you barely know into your personal life in this way. Still, social media can be a great way to stay in casual contact. It may not be quite as intense as texting or calling all the time, and some people might prefer something more lowkey.

He’ll want a second date

If he likes you, he’s probably going to want to see you again. The simplest way he can communicate that he likes you is by setting up a second date. This is a clearer sign of interest than any body language or eye contact could ever be. When he suggests you go out again, feel free to suggest things to do for the second date. You can even be adventurous and suggest a second date yourself. On the second date, he might want to be more intimate and respond positively if you want to cuddle or kiss.

He’ll mention his friends

If a guy is interested in you, he’s probably going to bring up talk about his friends, what they do, who they are, and stories about times spent together. When a guy does this, it could be because he is letting you into his life and wants to be closer. He may even mention to you that he talked about your date to his friends. If he begins inviting you into the lives of his friends (maybe even suggesting a group date), you can be sure he is thinking about more than just that first date.

Beyond the first date

Getty/Xavier Lorenzo
Dating can be challenging

It may be wise to have goals when you begin entering the dating scene. Do you want to have fun and go on as many dates as possible? Alternatively, are you looking for something more committed and long-term? Maybe something in the middle? There is no right or wrong answer; the choice is up to you. 

If you are looking for a committed relationship, though, you may want to consider couples counseling at some point. This type of counseling could be an effective way to strengthen the bond between you and your partner as you continue down the relationship path.

When looking for a therapist, it is crucial to find one that can fit your lifestyle and schedule. With traditional therapy, this can present an obstacle, especially when you’re working around two different calendars.  Online therapy provides a convenient solution. With internet-based counseling, you can have a session from home or anywhere you have Wi-Fi. You and your partner don’t even have to be in the same room. Online therapy is also a way to get the benefits of therapy without having to put your days on hold to travel to a therapist’s office.

Web-based couples counseling has also been proven effective. Scholarly research in the field shows that digital interventions can have positive outcomes while simultaneously reducing barriers associated with traditional types of treatment.

Takeaway

Your intuition is a powerful tool. Trust your instincts when it comes to figuring out if he likes you after the first date. You might instinctively know from body language, tone of voice, and words used if there was a spark or not. You can often feel the chemistry between two people, and if that’s not there, it is ok to move on from that person.
However you choose to handle figuring out if he likes you, remember that your worth isn’t wrapped up in someone’s opinion of you. You are a worthwhile person just as you are, and anyone would be lucky to get the chance to date you. Get more dating and relationship advice and access couples counseling online with Regain. 

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