7 Dating Tips To Find The Right One For You
Updated November 26, 2019
Dating someone new is an exciting and fun time for many people. When you meet someone that you want to pursue a relationship with, figuring out what to do and say to secure a long-term relationship can be difficult. Perhaps you have been out of the dating game for a while. On the other hand, the person you have met may seem different than others, making you want to do everything right. We all could use a few pointers to make the most out of a new relationship.
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No matter what stage of a new relationship you are in, here are some dating tips you can use to find the right person for you. If you play your cards right, you might get your forever person!
Be Yourself
When in a new relationship, many people fall into the trap of acting differently to impress their new love interest. This isn't a good approach when you are searching for a long-term partner. This is one of the dating tips that you must pay close attention to.
Understandably, you want to do things that make you stand out from the crowd. Acting out of character or doing lavish things to impress isn't the right way to go about this, though. The good news is there are many things you can do that will accomplish your goal without deceiving your new partner.
For example, instead of pretending to have an interest that you know this person is passionate about, find common ground. Chances are you two have something in common that is genuine. When you find that thing, you can zero in on it and bond over the activity. Perhaps you both love the outdoors. When you uncover this, you can plan a romantic date at a secluded place in the woods after a long hike. The thing that will make you stand out is your thoughtfulness and tact.
When you rely on genuineness to win the affection of your partner, you cannot fail. There will be no need to keep up a curtain or to maintain an image. You will be able to relax in knowing that you are true to yourself and your partner. As your relationship grows, it will be built on a foundation of honesty and trust. These are the building blocks of a good relationship. What better way to implement them than by making them a priority from your very first meeting?
Ask Questions
Don't be afraid to ask questions in a new relationship. The goal of dating, especially early on is to get to know one another. This is one of the easiest dating tips to implement into your life and relationships.
The rules surrounding what you can talk about on a date are much more lenient than they used to be. Where it might have been tabooed to talk about controversial or political topics before, it is acceptable now. Some people may even argue that it is imperative. The more you learn about a person, the better you will know whether you are compatible. Asking the tough questions right out of the gate will save you both time and heartbreak.
On the other hand, asking questions could make you realize a deeper connection between the two of you. There is always a possibility that the next date you go on will be your perfect match. If the two of you hit it off and you have similar interests and ideals, you will be a great match. The only way you can discover these traits though is by talking about them. The best way to encourage an open conversation is by asking questions.
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Take it Slow
New relationships bring about a plethora of emotions. You might feel excited, apprehensive, and maybe a little nervous. The beginning stages of a relationship are fun and exciting for most people. One of the most important dating tips to keep in mind is to take it slow.
When you meet someone new, resist the urge to rush your relationship. In the beginning, it is easy to get along with most people. Before the dust settles and his or her true personalities come to light, you could be dating someone radically different than the person you will be dating several months from now. For this reason, it is important to take things as slowly as possible to make sure the foundation you build is solid.
You know that you can trust yourself to be honest and upfront, but you likely don't know the other person. Even if you have been acquainted with this person for a long period, they could be a far different lover than a friend. The only way that you can be sure you are getting the most genuineness out of them is by waiting.
There is no need to rush a new relationship. If you are hoping for a long-term relationship to come out of this, you must be patient. You have all the time in the world to get to know this person and to build a life together. The last thing you want to do is rush into things and ruin the chance you have to stand on solid ground from the beginning. Even though it might be frustrating and difficult, you must take a breath and come up for air from time to time. Rushing into things will rarely yield a good result, especially in a new relationship.
Set and Respect Boundaries
Boundaries are extremely important, especially in a new relationship. You will need to set boundaries and stick to them. Your partner will also have his or her own set of boundaries that you will need to adhere to and respect.
It can be tempting in a new relationship to bend the rules, especially if you like this person. You must avoid this at all costs. While you may feel at ease doing this in the beginning, it will not last. Most people can put up with less than they deserve, but only for a short period. After a while, you will get tired of this person overstepping your boundaries, and it will ruin your relationship. The best way to ensure that the two of you are as happy as possible is to set strict boundaries and enforce them to the best of your ability.
Your partner could have boundaries that are radically different than yours. You may not understand many of them, as well. So much of what we allow or expect in a relationship is determined by what we have been through in the past. Because your experiences with exes and other past relationships won't be identical, neither will your boundaries. Even if a request seems unreasonable or unnecessary to you, you must adhere to and respect the boundaries set. This is the best way to make sure your partner is secure and happy with you.
The ultimate goal for both of you should be to make sure you are supporting one another. Above all, relationships are about love and support. If you can't respect one another's boundaries now, you are sure to run into additional problems later in your relationship. Make sure that you are putting in the work now to save yourself grief later. If you do, you will reap the benefits of a happy and healthy relationship for years to come.
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Don't Settle
The excitement surrounding meeting someone new can cloud our judgment. If you are battling feelings of loneliness or depression, it is even easier to want to settle.
Understand that a relationship that is not meant for you cannot fulfill you. If you choose to engage in relations with someone that doesn't check off your boxes, you won't be able to be happy. It may be difficult to remain patient, but you must wait around for someone that is right for you. The result will be a relationship with someone that you relate to and can make a life with. Only you know what that person needs to have to make you feel happy and fulfilled. Be patient and wait it out - you will find the right person for you.
Put Yourself First
This section was almost titled 'get a life.' Once we begin dating, it is so easy to slip into a pattern of being fully obsessed with finding and becoming close with another person. Because of this, we tend to cast aside our old friends and give up hobbies we once loved. If you don't believe this, consider that Tinder is a five-billion-dollar business with over 50 million members.
The trick here is finding a balancing act. Of course, you'll want to spend time dating. How else will you find the one? But you need to keep a separate life going as well. Otherwise, once you find the person you're seeking, you may not be personally healthy enough to sustain a fulfilling relationship.
Self-care should come first and foremost in any healthy relationship. While it is important for you to focus on your partner and show them attention, it is equally important to pay attention to yourself.
Setting aside thirty minutes every day to dedicate to taking care of you is a good place to start. You can use this time to meditate, take a bubble bath, or read a book. The activity you choose doesn't matter as much as the way it makes you feel. Choose an activity that is relaxing and makes you feel happy inside. If you have something that you are particularly passionate about, that would also be a great place to start.
Caring for yourself fills you up to be able to take care of others. The best relationships are a joined union of two people that love and care for themselves as they care for each other. One of the best dating tips out there is to put yourself first. In the process, everything else will fall into place.
Know When to Get Help
If dating is a particularly hard thing for you or you have overwhelming emotions surrounding it, seeing a professional can help.
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The counselors and therapists at ReGain are licensed, experienced professionals. They can help you tackle even the nastiest of relationship woes. When you reach out and get help for yourself, you are working on being the best version of you - a version of you that can thrive in and out of relationships.
