What Couples Therapy Questions Might A Therapist Ask?
Key takeaways
- Couples therapy offers a safe and supportive environment in which couples can discuss their relationship dynamics and collaboratively solve problems.
- A couples therapist may ask a number of questions. These are designed to help the couple make therapeutic progress, and they typically fall into standard categories.
- Answering a therapist’s questions honestly can open the door to productive communication, which can support the therapy process and contribute to a healthier, more satisfying relationship.
There may be no ideal relationship, but having a healthy and fulfilling relationship is entirely possible. By asking certain types of questions, a couples therapist can help you and your partner express yourselves and solve conflicts. These questions may fall into general categories, and sometimes your therapist might ask you to dig a bit deeper. Answering these questions honestly can help you and your partner make progress in therapy, helping you to express your feelings, get to the root of relationship problems, and work together to solve conflicts.
What is couples therapy?
Couples therapy is a type of therapy in which a couple works with a trained couples counselor in a supportive environment. The counselor acts as both a facilitator and educator, helping couples communicate and solve problems, while also teaching them valuable relationship skills.
Couples therapists
A couples counselor is often a licensed marriage and family therapist, but any type of trained and licensed counselor or psychologist can offer couples therapy. These types of mental health professionals have earned a master’s degree in their field, undergone clinical supervised practice, and passed a licensure exam. Furthermore, they are required to participate in ongoing professional development throughout their careers.
What couples therapy questions does a therapist ask?
During couples therapy sessions, a therapist will likely ask couples or marriage counseling questions. These questions are designed to increase understanding and improve communication, which may ultimately benefit the therapeutic process.
General types of couples therapy questions
Therapists ask you and your partner questions to understand more about a couples’ dynamic, goals, and challenges. A couples therapist might ask therapy questions specific to your and your partner’s relationship, but their questions will generally fall into these categories:
- Questions about the foundations of your relationship and how you met
- Questions about how you communicate
- Questions about how you handle conflict
- Questions about how you regard emotional intimacy and connection
- Questions about your values and life goals
- Questions about what you think the relationship needs
- Questions about the type of support that each individual needs
If your therapist feels that your answers yield important content to work on, they may dig deeper and ask you to explain your answers. Remember, their aim is not to criticize you or put you on the defensive with their questions. Rather, their questions are meant to support your growth as a couple and to help both you and your partner feel heard. Generally, the therapist is expected to remain neutral, as opposed to siding with one partner over the other.
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How does answering therapist questions help the therapeutic process?
Your couples or marriage counselor has been specially trained in questioning techniques that can prompt you and your partner to grow and make meaningful progress in therapy. In the process of openly answering questions, you and your partner will likely gain self-awareness, understanding of one another’s perspectives, empathy for one another, and insight into your relationship dynamics. All this can improve communication and help you problem solve, which may support the overall health of the relationship.
What are the overall benefits of couples therapy?
Attending couples therapy can have a number of positive impacts that help keep your relationship healthy. These can include:
- Increased emotional intimacy
- Better conflict resolution skills
- Better problem-solving skills
- More relationship satisfaction
Benefits of online couples therapy
Seeing a couples therapist in person can be a valuable experience, but attending couples therapy online may work better for some couples. These couples may not only appreciate the affordability and convenience of online therapy, but they might also prefer the increased discretion that comes with attending therapy from the comfort of their own homes. You can easily sign up on an online therapy platform like Regain and schedule an appointment with a couples therapist.
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Takeaway
Couples therapy can be invaluable for a couple, helping them to communicate and to solve problems. Part of this process is having a couples therapist who asks targeted questions. Answering these types of questions honestly can lead to improved communication and increased empathy, ultimately allowing a couple to build a good relationship with a positive future. A couples therapist who offers therapy through an online therapy platform can guide you through the therapy process while you attend sessions from the comfort of your own home.
What questions will a couples therapist ask?
During your first session and over the course of therapy, a couples counselor may ask a wide range of questions to get to know both you and your partner as well as your relationship dynamics. Some examples could include:
- What brought you to couples therapy?
- What do you hope to achieve through couples counseling?
- What makes you feel safe in a relationship?
- How do the two of you deal with conflict?
- What are your biggest challenges related to communication?
What not to say during couples therapy?
Your therapist will strive to create a safe space where you can feel comfortable discussing your true feelings. Generally, there aren’t any rules about what you should and shouldn’t say. However, it may not be helpful to make disparaging comments about your partner or directly blame them for the problems in your relationship.
How do I prepare for a couples therapy session?
To get the most out of a couple’s therapy session, it might be beneficial to focus on your goals for the session and for the relationship as a whole. Some people find meditation or relaxation techniques to be helpful prior to a session to regulate emotions and put them in the best mindset for a challenging conversation.
What is the most common problem addressed in couples therapy?
Common topics and relationship problems discussed in therapy include:
- Current challenges in the relationship
- Communication styles and techniques
- How to resolve conflict effectively
- Attachment issues
- Emotional needs
- Relationship goals
What is the hardest year for a couple?
Some relationship experts say the first year of marriage is the hardest as people adjust to the expectations of their partner. Others say year seven is the most challenging when partners may begin to lose passion in the relationship or grow apart.
What percent of couples divorce after couples therapy?
According to some estimates, only about 25 to 30% of couples divorce after receiving counseling. Moreover, studies cite improvements in overall mental health and well-being after attending therapy sessions with their partner.
What are deep questions for couples?
Some of the deeper or more challenging questions a couples therapist might ask include:
- Are you interested in your partner’s happiness and wellbeing?
- Are either of you engaging in substance misuse?
- Are you able to talk to each other openly, or do you avoid certain topics?
- What positive changes do you want your partner to make? What changes can you make to strengthen the relationship?
- Does conflict with your partner feel scary? If so, describe this feeling.
- Do you have regular check-ins with your partner to discuss how they’re feeling? If so, how do these conversations typically go?
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