What To Know About Dating Older Men

The world of dating can be immensely complex, multi-layered, and interesting. Different relationships and partnerships may inherently come with various dynamics which impact the involved individuals. Many people have their preferences in what they're looking for in a significant other, including ideal traits, characteristics which they aim to steer clear of, and much more. In many cases, there can be certain types of relationships that often attract various opinions and feedback. Relationships with older people, such as someone dating an older man, can be one such relationship.

There may be some useful nuggets of information individuals might benefit from knowing before entering into these types of relationships. Below are some pieces of advice that could be beneficial to people who are dating or thinking about dating older men.

A quick word on dating older men

First, and most importantly, comes this: dating older men can be perfectly fine as long as both parties are consenting adults. Contrary to certain beliefs, an individual who dates older men is not always doing so because of a challenging relationship with their own father or for monetary gain. For decades, age-gap relationships have attracted critics, but relationships which involve older men dating younger partners are sometimes uniquely prone to negative feedback.

No matter who you date, it can help to know you who are and feel comfortable with yourself. There will probably be outsiders who have their own assessments of who you are and who you choose to date; try not to let this dictate or control the trajectory of your life. Attempting to gain everyone's approval is a likely path to dissatisfaction in life.

Nonetheless, if you are thinking about, interested in, or currently dating older men, there may certainly be some details of which you deserve to be cognizant.

Realities of dating older men

Dating older men can be different from dating a person who is your age or close to your age. This doesn't mean that the relationship is doomed to fail; as a matter of fact, there may be many examples of May-December romances which have yielded success and are still going strong. However, being fully aware of the realities which typically accompany dating an older man can only benefit you and ensure that you make an informed and well-thought-out decision, regardless of what that may be.

He might be likelier to know what he wants

With age often comes the ability for someone to know exactly what they want and what they don't want. For some people, this can be a relief. Older men may also be more likely to be very clear on what type of relationship they're interested in having. In your case, it'll likely be up to you to determine whether or not what you're looking for is in alignment with his interests. Of course, it can be important to note the benefits which often come along with dating someone who knows what they want in life. Sometimes, a younger romantic partner can be more fickle or unsure of what they're looking for; of course, this does not apply to every younger person.

He may have children

Older men may be likelier to have children and a former spouse. This isn't always negative, but it can impact the dynamics of a relationship. Not everyone can handle dating someone who is a parent and has an ex-spouse. Only you can determine whether or not this is something you're ready for. There may be countless relationships where people have dated single, older fathers and things have worked out; however, there might also be additional scenarios which have resulted in a less-than-happy ending. Therefore, if you're thinking of dating older men, it might be useful to ask yourself if you're ready to be in a relationship with a man who has children from a previous relationship.

You should probably know what you want

While older men might be more likely to know what they want out of a relationship, it can also be equally important for you to be aware of who you and know what you want. In many cases, this can be something that comes with experience, living life, and being in various relationships.

If you find yourself dating an older person for the first time, you may learn along the way that there are certain things which you do and don't want. If you're someone who has previously dated older men, then it may be much more likely that you'll be more aware of what you do and don't want out of the relationship. The ultimate blueprint to figuring out your interests in any relationship might be to trust yourself and follow your instincts.

Sometimes, age is just a number

When older men are in relationships with significantly younger partners, people sometimes question what both parties may have in common. The argument here often asserts that with age comes different interests and outlooks on life. In certain cases, this can be accurate, but not always. There can be many May-December romances where both parties have similar interests, enjoy similar activities, and can bond with one another. In situations like this, age really can be just a number and the impact of the age gap might be barely evident in the relationship.

Is dating older men right for you?

You may be wondering whether dating older men is right for you after taking these details into account. That can be perfectly understandable, but the truth of the matter may be that there's not one answer to this question. Not all older men are the same. You may be compatible with certain older men and not so compatible with others. Ultimately, it likely depends on you and which older men you're involved with or considering a relationship with.

No matter who you’re dating, almost all relationships can hit rough patches and go through challenges at one point or another. What matters is often navigating these rough patches with your significant other in healthy and productive ways. Going through a tough period in a relationship with an older man may not be an anomaly; like other partnerships, if both parties are willing to work with one another and find mutually beneficial solutions, the relationship usually has a much better shot at success.

If, for some reason, you feel as though dating older men isn't right for you, there's nothing wrong with this, either. Only you know which relationships are best for you and what you'll feel most comfortable with. There's absolutely nothing wrong with dating people who are closer to your age range. Happiness in life and relationship satisfaction generally comes when people follow what feels right to them, as opposed to going out of their way to prove a point to others.

When relationship trouble strikes

When you're having trouble in a relationship, regardless of your significant other's age, having other people to confide in can be of value. A supportive network of people who care about you and have your best interests at heart may be imperative whenever you're going through a rough time or having doubts about what next steps to take.

If you and your significant other, if you have one, are open to it, pursuing couples counseling can also be an option that can provide aid to relationships of all kinds. Signing up for online therapy with Regain can help you and your significant other can get help, regardless of where you are or what your schedules look like.

No matter what you’re experiencing, therapy may end up being extremely beneficial for you and your loved ones. Studies have shown that online couples therapy in particular can be just as effective or more effective than traditional in-person counseling.

Takeaway

Nearly every type of relationship brings a unique set of challenges and opportunities to the individuals involved, and relationships with older men are no exception. While societal pressures, norms, and expectations can present obstacles when dating an older man, healthy relationship habits can help you and your partner thrive.