I Just Want To Run Away: Reasons For Running Away And The Answer To The Desire To Run

When things are particularly tough and overwhelming, some of us do not want to or may feel as though we can’t deal with our responsibilities and daily life. For some, this can lead to a desire to escape from it all and run away.

Children running away

The phrase “running away” tends to get associated with young people and for a good reason: over 140,000 of them are reported missing every year, with many of them categorized as runaways.

Reasons children may want to run away

But where does this desire to run come from? Why do they want to run away?

Being unhappy at home is, without a doubt, one of the most significant factors involved in children running away. This can be due to a child feeling as though they are not seen or heard, because there are rules that they dislike or that are unfair, because of abuse, an unhappy or unhealthy home life, and more.

Bullying is another primary reason why children run. Being bullied can lead a child to feel isolated and unsafe when they are at school. Additionally, with the advent of social media, in particular, being able to escape from that bullying by going home is no longer possible.

Bullies are now given the tools to harass other kids on a near-constant basis. This can make children feel like they have nowhere to turn, leaving running away as the only option to get away from all of the harassment and abuse.

If you are facing or witnessing abuse of any kind, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available. Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or Text "START" to 88788. You can also use the online chat.

Another primary reason that children run away has to do with sexual orientation or preference. Children who identify as LGBTQIA+ can face unique challenges as they grow up. In some cases, the parent may kick the child out of the home for the way that they identify. In much worse cases, abuse may be involved. In any event, it creates an unsafe environment for a child who is merely exploring themselves and trying to figure out who they are.

Adults who want to run away

Much like it is with children, adults may choose to run because of factors in their lives. But knowing what those factors are and how they can drive someone to leave is important to know. Sometimes, it can be challenging to see the signs before an adult disappears from the life they knew.

Reasons adults may want to run away

Stress is one of the most significant factors involved in trying to run away or escape life in some way. As adults, we are expected to work a full-time job, pay our bills on time, take care of our bodies, care for our families, and about a thousand other things. Doing all those things and doing them well can feel overwhelming, time-consuming, and stressful.

It likely will not surprise you to know that finances are the leading cause of stress in relationships. Fighting about money is commonplace because, for many in the United States and worldwide, money is tied to so many things. When adults get behind on bills, it isn’t just a matter of paying them late. Get behind on your energy bills, and the electricity could get shut off. Get behind on the house payment, and you could find yourself without a home.

These are serious stresses to face daily, and factors such as these may lead some adults to abandon their lives and try to start over somewhere else. 

The desire to run away from relationships

Even if marriage is not involved, some factors lead to adults disappearing instead of ending the relationship. This is commonly called “ghosting.”

There is no universal tip here, and handling the situation in an adult manner can be difficult. When things like emotions and the factors listed above enter the equation, it can make adults think irrationally and do things that they may not normally do.

There is no avoiding stress. We are all human beings, and all of us have different stresses in our lives. It is finding a way to manage those stresses healthily which is important to tackle. 

What to do if you feel like running

For both children and adults alike, the answer should not be running. Instead of fleeing from one's life problems, the goal should be to find balance, practice healthy coping skills and outlets, and learn to lean on those who care about us. Finding a support system in family and friends can help mitigate the stresses that can lead to the urge to run.  

Counseling can also be a helpful tool. As much as we all deserve to have a support system in our lives, not all of us do. Having someone to talk to, even if it is to vent about the things in one's life, can be enough to prevent overwhelm and ensure that we are able to rationally and healthily tackle everyday life and anything that may pop up.

Understand your desire to run away in online therapy

If you or someone you know is feeling overwhelmed by life or as though you aren’t seen or heard by the individual you are, know that help is available. The experts at Regain can offer discreet, professional, and effective help and support. 

Regain online therapy can be conducted via video chat, phone call, instant in-app messaging, or live voice recordings. Additionally, studies have found internet-based therapy to be just as effective, sometimes more so, than traditional in-person therapy. For example, the National Center for Health Research reviewed dozens of studies, finding it to be highly effective for a variety of conditions and concerns, including depression, trauma, PTSD, anxiety, and more.