About me
Something in your life has led you to search for a resource to help you find the answers and develop the skills to alleviate your distress. My style is warm, real, and practical. I embrace humor and honesty in therapy. I balance helping you gain a greater understanding of yourself with taking action, supporting your every step. I strive to provide the best services possible by helping you to feel deeply understood by considering all the aspects of your unique story and using therapeutic techniques that have been shown by research to be effective. Russ Harris identifies four approaches to any troubled relationship situation:
1. Leave
2. Stay and change what can be changed and live by your values
3. Stay and accept what can’t be changed and live by your values
4. Stay and give up and increase your suffering through self-defeating behaviors
What are your values that guide you in your relationship? Common relationship values couples identify are connection, caring, and contribution.
We will work together to strengthen your communication skills, improve your ability to resolve conflict; clarify your relationship values, establish goals and identify actions you are willing to take to reach your goals that are consistent with your values.
The framework that I use is ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy). One of the main goals of ACT stated by Dr. S. Hayes is "changing our relationship to our thoughts and emotions, rather than changing their content, is the key to healing and realizing our true potential. People become identified with the content of their mental life to a large extent by fusion, evaluation, avoidance, and reason giving." Dr. Liz Stanley succinctly states a working model for me – “access choice in all life situations, and align our actions to our intentions and values”. The Gottmans’ principles of marriage counseling influence much of my work with couples. I have adapted these two models into most all of my work as a therapist.
For the past seven years I have worked as a Military & Family Life Counselor providing non-medical counseling, psychoeducation and coaching to service members and their dependents. For the past four years I have worked in Africa, Poland, Germany and England providing services to deployed military personnel.
My life is full of experiences that inform my work as a therapist – my father’s death when I six years old, a blended family, divorce, and now almost 30 years into a marriage with a wonderful partner. I started working as a marriage and family therapist in 1976 but left the profession and spent twenty years in international business development. I returned to the profession about nine years ago. It's such an honor to explore and guide another as we sort through their lives seeking relief and direction.
Specialties
- Relationships
- Family conflicts
- Grief
- Intimacy
- Parenting issues
Stress, Anxiety , Trauma and abuse , Self esteem , Career difficulties , Depression , Coping with life changes , Coaching , Compassion fatigue , ADHD , Blended Family Issues , Caregiver issues and stress , Commitment Issues , Read more...
Clinical approaches:
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Gottman Method
Years of Experience: 25
Services offered
Messaging
Phone
Video
Licensing
NC LMFT 1599
Reviews
These quotes represent just a few of the many positive reviews that we have received for Timothy Holsather. We don't pay anyone to provide their review and they are all made voluntarily. Some people's experience receiving therapy with Regain might be different.
Dr Tim has been essential in me accepting and moving forward and learning my self anew
Gives very good insights to problems. Has a very calm and relaxing approach. Makes you feel at ease, good experience so far.
Great therapist that really knows his stuff and is great at giving structure and practical feedback to work with
Timothy Holsather, or Dr. Tim as I refer to him is passionate about his work and professional in his manner. His focus isn’t to break but to build a better person. Being heard, understood and valued as a person has truly had positive impact on my mental health.
Tim has a gentle but insightful manner. He quickly senses what is at the heart of your issues and gives you practical tasks and techniques to improve things which reassures you immediately. Our session ended leaving us feeling understood, like we better understood each other and with a sense of responsibility and agency over our circumstances and future happiness.
Our first session was extremely helpful and we are both looking forward to working with him going forward. Easy to talk to, offers a variety of tools and ideas to work through issues and have both me and my husband the opportunity to share.
Timothy is a warm, kind and laid back therapist who makes you feel okay to open up. He provides a non judgemental environment and his approach is very clear to understand, breaking down your over all relationship as a couple, into smaller tools and tricks.
Thank you for sharing your gifts with us Tim! :)